Search Results: how to ask a stranger out

I've always known that most women have a natural fear of men, especially if they are strangers. Men are stronger and usually more capable of inflicting physical harm & rape. That sure as hell doesn't mean that men will automatically do that. The vast majority of us would never even think of doing that. That even includes hitting a woman back when they hit us first (which is bullshit but that's another post).

But I can remember breaking up with my ex girlfriend a year ago. We were on the rocks and I had to come by her place to get my bicycle that was stored there. I also had to return some of her items. I expected to hear something bad from her that day (i. e. breakup) because things weren't going well the 2 weeks earlier.

Earlier in the week I asked her what would be a good time to stop by her place. She told me a specific time on the weekend. When I got there her roommate and her boyfriend were there. We were cordial but then my girlfriend said "hey Joey lets go for a walk". I then asked her roommate & her boyfriend if they wanted the living room door open or closed. I had noticed that the door was open when I got there. The boyfriend said "keep it open!". The tone in his voice was telling. My soon to be ex most likely told her roommate to be around when I came by. Her roommate likely invited her boyfriend over to just KEEP AN EYE on me. Just having three people look at me like I was a scumbag was a really awkward, embarrassing and shitty situation.

Now I had never once been violent, abusive or threatening with my ex girlfriend while we dated. Ever. I did get angry with her a few times but I never raised by voice. It's also not like I showed up to her doorstep unexpectedly.

Anyway above might not be the best example. However I remember feeling extremely insulted that she probably went to that extent (making sure her roommate and her boyfriend were around) because she was scared of how I would react even though I never gave her reason to think otherwise.

she's always complimenting everything and almost never has a criticism. So you can't tell if she likes something or is just saying it to please people.

With her friends and stranger she has a different tone. Example, "heyyyyyyyyyy girllllll how are you" it's an extra level of excitement with everyone. Feels like she is almost never laid back.

And with my family she is very nice to them but she won't start conversations usually, unless its shallow topics like discussing movies and tv shows. My parents admit to me that her presence is not felt and they feel she doesn't have a personality at all.

Then when I'm with her family I'm always myself and I dont put on an act, so she often asks me "hey are you ok?" As if being quiet sometimes and laid back means I'm not OK.

she's always complimenting everything and almost never has a criticism. So you can't tell if she likes something or is just saying it to please people.

With her friends and stranger she has a different tone. Example, "heyyyyyyyyyy girllllll how are you" it's an extra level of excitement with everyone. Feels like she is almost never laid back.

And with my family she is very nice to them but she won't start conversations usually, unless its shallow topics like discussing movies and tv shows. My parents admit to me that her presence is not felt and they feel she doesn't have a personality at all.

Then when I'm with her family I'm always myself and I dont put on an act, so she often asks me "hey are you ok?" As if being quiet sometimes and laid back means I'm not OK.