Search Results: heart is breaking

I broke up with a boyfriend of two years two years ago (so we began dating four years ago). I was 17 when we met and began dating. We were very similar and I found a genuinely good person in him. I wish my children were as kind and caring as he was. But the thing is, I had absolutely 0 chemistry with him and I didn't even want to kiss him. I think because of this then I began getting irritated at small things. Then I began perceiving him as my son (yes!) because he was a little too immature by his looks and voice and everything and also I lacked all kind of passion. In my psychology, he is a child. But I have kind of this motherly love to him... and I feel absolutely horrible that I broke his heart because he still loved me later and he is the best person ever...
Don't get me wrong, I am happily getting married soon to the love of my life. This my ex is just a guiltful mother-child love I have...

Let me start off by explaining that my last relationship didn't end too well. We dated for about 5 months and I was really falling for him, but then he ended it a week before Valentine's Day. About a couple months later I created a dating profile to try and move on. I wasn't looking for a relationship. Just maybe potential new friends because that was one of the options, to look for friends only, but if the friendship led in that direction for both if us then that's ok. I started talking to this guy and we seemed to really hit it off and he seemed very genuine. But then my ex messaged and apologized and wanted to get together to talk. I agreed, because I still had feelings for him. We got back together and I disabled my account. About a week later he told me he had started doing drugs to help him sleep and asked me if I would like to get high with him for fun. I can't stand drugs. I don't like the smell or the addiction, and I especially don't like the long term problems they cause. I told him I wasn't interested and he never asked again. A couple months later, I felt like we were never going to be how we were. The breakup, and especially the fact that he started doing drugs, pretty much ruined any chance we had of a future together. So we finally broke up for good. A week later I reactivated my dating profile and specifically started looking for new friends only. No exceptions. The guy I had been chatting with sent me a message and we finally decided to meet in person after talking for another month and a half. I have been quickly falling for him since then. We talk about the future and stupid things like whether pineapple belongs on pizza or not. Lol. But when he drops me off at home each night after a date, I feel like my heart is just breaking in two because he's going to drive away in his car and go to his home. I feel like I don't know what to do and that he's going to end up leaving me like my last two bfs did. My mom says it might be a rebound. Is it really?