Search Results: ruining a chance

My ex and I are talking and i want him back. At the beginning of the year I had an app I did not tell him about and i cheated on him on there. In total i cheated about 14 times throught this year. He cheated 3 times with his 2 different Ex's. I made up lies from the previous 2016, and he found out about them all in 2017 and i still tried to hide the others (they all came out over time however). Tjeu were terrible such as rape, abortion, and pregnancy. He also had lies however (what im about to share happened this last week with him) he pulled this huge prank full of lies. He said he was gonna chest on me behind my back and had his friend screenshot it and show me. He lied and said he took her virginity (he still will not tell me if he actually did). He lied that he proposed to her and that she had actually been lying to him. While he was Doing this i made bad judgment calls however. I unblocked an ex (we did not talk) and a friend that i blocked over her being stupid (i did talk to her but i ended up reblocking her the next day) and i started dating someone and i gave himca nude in the first day (we swapped them). However the next day it all came out after i haf to contact his uncle and he was pissed at me for contacting amd ruining his families Christmas. I had to contact his uncle because my ex tried to kill himself over the phone again. (This has happened on 3 occasions and he hates me every time for contacting his family) i ended up sending my ex a nude and almost sexted with him cheating on my boyfriend. Whom i then had to break up with after. I personally love attention and i did a lot to get back at my ex. Him and i are far far far from perfect. He also lied about more saying he cheated a lot more then 3 times because he wanted to hurt my feelings. He has given me many chances to change through the year. I am fully ready to make all the changes necassary however i do not blame him for not believing it. I would give everything for one last chance.

So yes my boobs are huge and I've always been very self conscious about my body and waist but one thing I know people find attractive are boobs so i took advantage of that and showed them off every chance I could. I'm in college so its a little more acceptable to dress that revealing. But I'm starting to wonder if the way I dress (When i go out only) translates to more then wow she's hot. I'm worried it translates to she's a slut she's looking for attention. I get looks from girls and it hurts because like trust me if i had that tiny waist i would show it off in a tight shirt or crop top, but my best asset are my boobs so thats what Iead with. I'm really into this guy but now I'm worried he thinks im a slut or wtvr. I definitely get attention from guys which i dont mind, but im starting to worry this is ruining my reputation. My friends say "no dont worry, its college, you're hot, its your thing, you're known for it and theyre natural if youve got em, flaunt em" but im still worried bc I've been called horrible names by jealous girls and it does hurt, at the same time i like the attention from guys and it makes me feel hot. Please let me know if it translates to you more then just being hot and if it had to do with me as a person