Search Results: talking about marriage in a relationship

i am an African lady, born and raised in nigeria, i am currently living in Canada though.
as an African lady, i am expected to respect men without gaining respect in return. i want a guy who believes in equality between a man and a woman, a man who would respect me the way i respect him. i told my family about how i want to be a lawyer, but their answers was like that is really good but dont try to gain a lot of money than your husband, let your future husband be the leader, i replied back to them saying "what if i gain a lot than my husband, is that a bad thing" and they all replied yes that no man likes a woman who earned more than him. i was talking to two of my friends, one was a guy who just came from nigeria and the other one was a girl that was born in Canada, we were talking about relationship, i told them about how i paid during a first date and the guy ( a nigerian) never called back, m y guy friend told me not to ever pay for food on a date that it is a turn off for a guy, and my girlfriend said i did the right thing. another situation occured when i told my cousin that i want a guy who believed in sharing house work and he won't expect me to cook and go to work altogether and his reply was that i would die single and old. a guy asked me out on a date, and when i told him that i was virgin and i wasn't going to have sex with him, he said why and i replied that i dont believe in sex before marriage, and wasn't because of a religion, it is because of a personal experience. i am really too much? do i have high standard, if yes how do i bring it down?

If I had to select a score on a 1-10 scale, I would probably say more than 5. While there are some men that will still be jerks, controlling and cheaters no matter how sweet his girlfriend or wife is (in that case, he doesn't deserve anyone), I don't think that's always the case.

There are certain things that can annoy/bore the heck out of a guy IMO:

- Nagging and arguing (even more irritating if it comes with insults)
Really? Do you have to repeat something more than twice to make your point? What exactly is the woman gaining by doing that? More than likely the guy probably wants to walk out the door to get some fresh air (by himself) where he should be spending his spare time with the woman he loves.
- The drama queen
Literally, my mother threw a big tantrum (crying too) because her cell phone had no access for a couple day. Meanwhile my father had this ''not this again'' expression of annoyance in his face. I don't even act like that on my period.

- Neglecting a man's need constantly
While I get that there will be times we're tired from work as well, that doesn't mean there is no time at all for him. At the very least, asking how his day was at work, giving him a cup of tea or hugging him before going to bed is a difference than not even trying at all. Then off course, being on the computer all day long or on your cell talking to your friends nonstoppable while the guy is right there waiting.

At the end of the day, both are responsible for putting their time and effort (off course if the guy is all moody for no reason after I simply asked him how his day was and if he wanted a cup of tea, then that's him being a jerk) to work out their relationship or marriage. I'm just pointing out certain things some women do that might lead to the relationship or marriage following apart.