Search Results: stick around for the chase

OK, so I have always found it more natural and even attractive when a girl approaches a guy she is interested in or even makes the first move. I'm not saying do all the work, but just make the first move. Be the one that apporaches the guy, not the other way around. When they show interest in me first, it speaks volumes for me. I guess the thinking process of this for me is that, as a guy, society has brain washed guys and girls to think that the men are supposed to chase the girl and to make the first move and so on and so forth. And it just ain't so Joe (ann) :p. I mean, how many relationships are crappy, end in divorce, or have no real affection towards each other? Way too many. Heck, most. And I think this is why.

I think guys chasing a girl is contrawise to how God created us. But even more than that, I believe that when a guy is making all the moves, doing all of the initiating, putting in all the investing and interest, then it's not really a mutual thing. It's basically, I'm the guy. I like you a lot and the girl is kind of just there taking all of the attention. Feeding her ego. And the guy is stuck in this endless cycle of validating himself. The girl is just with the guy b/c she doesn’t want to be without one. And he is good for now, but she will easily dump him for another. And not even necessarily a better one. It's just 'new.'

And this is what I mean about "why aren't women making the first moves?" Like, ok yea. You want me to come approach you. Ok, easy. Done. You want me to do this and that. Like some check list. It's just so easy and robotic. But is there any real attraction? Or is it just that I am checking all of your damn boxes on your list? Not to be rude or mean. But I am just really turned off by these check lists from girls.

If a girl would approach me first or make the first move, I would feel more inclined to be the man and lead. But when You make the guy do everything, the guy never feels like he is wanted or needed. Like come on ladies.

i know what many will say' NO" and i can see why of course, he's my best friend and we will be lifetime bros. but let me give some quick background. He was with this girl, who he never called his girlfriend they just kinda were messiing around i guess, but im guesiing he didn't wanna start a reltionship with her. this was a while back ago. I never personnaly knew her, only knew of her, and now me and her both work at the same store and see each other frequently. she's a pretty girl and like any other pretty girl i see , i am nice and friendly to them. well apparantly she likes me for that and reached out to my friends asking for my number. he then texts me later that night telling me not to get at her. He is a very blunt person and did tell me that she did like me, its a little bit odd since he already has agf right now and he seems to be jeoulous or something. And id be lying if i said i didn't like her as well, but anyways im kinda stuck cuz im really chasing her, but i dodnt wanna change my attitude towards and i dont wanna disrespect my best friend either... im between a rock and hard place lol, what should i do? and is it right if i were to have a relatiionship with my best freinds ex?