Search Results: changed since college

My cousin has dated her boyfriend for nearly 2 years now. However, once in a while the past still hurts her.
When they were 15-16 year-olds, the guy used to be a jerk. He was one of the main social bullies (put bad nicknames on her) and used spread jokes about her facial acne and glasses. While laughing, he once someone would have to be blind or drunk to ever date her. He gave her a hard time and she used to come home stressed out. She hated school.

He came to eating his own words and things happened. I heard karma got him during the summer and he softened up. He worked hard and did so much to be a better person. What impressed her the most was that his apologies and promises were then followed by actions such as when he got involved in anti-bullying campaigns and participated (still does) in a couple animal shelters. He gained her friendship first. It wasn't until late Now 2019 (they were college juniors by then), that they officially started dating.

He's been treating her great since and has changed. He knows she's hurt at times and still apologizes, claiming he'll do anything to make that hurt go away. Needless to say, he informed his friends and I that he was to surprise her on Valentine's Day but not to tell her. He's hoping the answer is a yes. We know what it is. He really loves her. If someone worked hard to amend their awful behaviors and hasn't relapsed since, should they be forgiven?

I know most of you will say you dont believe in leagues but we’re going to discuss it anyways. If i’m being 100% honest, if i feel someones out of my league, its likely because i dont see myself working to get to their level. For example, if i got all dolled up and Brad Pitt took me on a date, I’d end it with “I had a great time but you're so out of my league.” I say that because 99% of the time, I’m going to be dressed in sweats and walking around with that “i just woke up” bed hair 😂 I’m not willing to make the efforts to get on his level in the long run, so I may as well say he’s out of my league, send him on his way, and save him from my lack of efforts since I’m not willing to change. Now lets say, he likes me for the tomboy i am. Its happened before. But i dont fully trust they’ll stay happy. I liked this guy Robbie in college. He was 9/10 gorgeous. Dude looked like a model but he liked plain jane ole ME. However, I overheard comments he made to other guys about how cute he found the girls covered in makeup and wearing dresses. It was clear that my lack of efforts to appear more feminine would mean that I’d never truly be enough for him. So why waste my time if i refuse to be that girly girl that he would find MORE attractive in the long run. So i quit pursuing him 🤷‍♀️ I had an ex who told me “youre too much” and literally followed up with the fact that he didn't want to get a job and do his part in the relationship. He said he wanted to let his parents take care of him as long as possible so that he could sit around and play games all day. See he wanted me to stay but that warning was a way to save me from himself. I say take it with a grain of salt and see the statement as a compliment rather than just someone being insecure.
#FeelFreeToList #OutOfMyLeague

She was married to a lawyer for nearly 8 years. She fell out of love sometime in 2016 (on the 4th year) and instead of communicating, kept postponing having kids and leading him on. She was acting a leech and user by then, living the comfortable life and just being with him for his wealth. Supposedly he was boring (not exciting anymore nor adventurous) and she wanted to get out of the routine but still hold on to him, not divorce him.

Then in 2019 she started cheating and got caught by early 2020. She got dumped (was initially unremorseful and happy about cheating) and received nothing during his divorce process. Then her lover obviously kicked her out, it didn't work out with other guys either and her mother had to get a liver transplant to save her life (the person that paid for it was none other than her ex husband). She's been remorseful since, claimed to have changed for the better, doesn't care about wealth anymore and has been trying to earn his love back (even made promises about giving him a child) but he wants nothing from her.

Honestly she had it so easy. She didn't even work, cook, clean the house (they had two maids doing it all) nor even return to college to finish her Master's. She did nothing at all and was good at nothing. All she had to do is be faithful and she couldn't even do that, losing everything. Wouldn't that make her the most stupidest woman ever?