Search Results: new attitude

When I have a first date with a lady, I may get a haircut in advance. I make reservations at a very nice restaurant. I clean out my car, wash and vacuum it, and do a general detailing. If the date is on a Friday night and I am coming from work, I am wearing a suit and tie. On Saturday night, I wear "business casual" attire and I will occasionally purchase a new shirt or new pants for the occasion. I am well groomed and I apply a SMALL amount of after shave. On the date, my chivalrous manners are out in force. I open doors for her, help her get seated, and I was attentive to her.

Why do I do all of this? It makes a statement to my date: this guy takes dating seriously, he wants to make a good impression on me, and he will treat me nicely if I get into a relationship with him. Yes, I know that many guys on this site will say that this is WAY too much effort and I am making myself subservient to her by "sucking up" so openly. That is not true. I make it clear to a woman that while I am willing to treat her like a queen, I will expect her to treat me like a king.

The women I date have a similar attitude about dating and, in particular, a first date. They arrive for the date dressed very nicely, very nicely groomed, and it is obvious that they, too, want to make a good impression. This is how my generation dates.

I could go the casual route but I fear that my date might think that none of this is a very big deal for me or maybe I am one of those guys who is afraid to show any signs of caring at all. I think that is a horrible impression to give on a first date.

How do you approach a first date?

When you are in the early stages of dating, you are excited about spending time with your new partner, and you want to be attentive to everything that he or she is saying.

Or. . . is that what you want? Your best friend just broke up with her boyfriend of two months and she texts you, reaching out for support. Or your little sister can't decide what to wear to the school dance tonight and she texts asking your opinion. Do you take the time to respond now or do you stay attuned to your date's soliloquy about himself (or herself?) Which is more important?

What does your date think when you are on the phone texting and ignoring them? You are supposed to be on your best behavior when you are dating; is this really as good as it gets with you? Are you addicted to your phone and can't resist when you hear that notification of a new text?

If you have had this experience, you probably feel very resolute in your attitude on this subject. What do you think?