Search Results: how far do i pursue her

I occasionally see posts from girls complaining that their boyfriend has actually LOOKED at another girl. I am not defending the behavior illustrated above, but I think this is one of those Mars/Venus situations where the girlfriend usually attaches far too much importance to the occurrence.

Men are visual creatures. Even when we are in a committed relationship, a pretty girl attracts our attention. We can fantasize about what it would be like to have sex with someone other than our current girlfriend. That does NOT mean that we want to be unfaithful.

I live with my girlfriend and I hope that our relationship grows stronger for the rest of our lives. However, I still look at other women and appreciate their beauty, even younger women. . . BUT that does not mean that I want to pursue that other woman. I also have a girlfriend from my past - Oksana - who is very attractive and very nice; if our circumstances were different, I would be dating or living with her instead of my current girlfriend. I sometimes fantasize about having sex with Oksana. However, I have absolutely no contact with Oksana and I have no intentions of ever again contacting her. I must confess that I also fantasize about Kristen Bell but that's not gonna happen, either!

None of this behavior equates with infidelity. If your ability to maintain your relationship depends on your partner never looking at another pretty girl or handsome guy, your relationship is doomed. He may have turned to look at the cute waitress as she walked away, but he went home with you. . . right? Instead of complaining about something that seems to be innate and immutable, why not be grateful that your partner works to avoid temptation?

After all. . . haven't you - even just once - looked at someone else while you were in a relationship?