Search Results: truth hurts

So, I have been with my girlfriend for a long time. About 5 1/2 years.

Early in the relationship (around the 3 month mark) she lied to me about her ex texting her. It happened while I think I was looking at her phone whike she wrote a note. I didn't see what it said. She lied and said it was her female roommate that texted her (Completely different names). I gave her about a dozen chances to tell the truth. Finally I told her I already knew and saw. She admitted she got a text from him, but it that she isn't doing anything, he just tries to text her sometimes, and since I had a friend/family member dying of Cancer at the time (R. I. P. Joe Basara), she didn't want me to worry and overthink.

There have been a few more small lies, omissions of truth, and more over the years, but I legitimately believe she loves me. We have been with each other through some of our more difficult times thus far, and she's a very emotionally feeling person. She loves animals, she can't handle people or animals being hurt without bursting into tears, etc.

But I still don't trust her completely. I haven't trusted her since that day when she proved she could lie right to my face. We have been long distance for about 3 years (Her family moved and we weren't equipped to move in together at the time), so I wouldn't even know if anything was going on.

She also lied about the state of her coworker's marriage. She claims she didn't know, but they were in a really bad place and about to divorce. She showed me her texts to make me feel better, and while he definitely talked about the marriage being in a bad spot, there didn't seem to be signs of anything more than him mentioning it and just being an acquaintance. Messages likely weren't deleted.

How can I trust her again? Should I?

The reason why i put a quotation mark in there is because i CAN be brutally honest whether you like it or not. I don't like sugar coating and joking about something but the way i do it is for motivational purpose and with care specially if it's someone i cared about. But of course only if anyone asked for it. If you still think i'm being rude then that's not my problem. Can't blame me if truth hurts. But on the bright side truth is not always unpleasant. Sometimes if the truth is just so pleasant, you'll think it's a lie.

Being brutally honest with someone, and having someone else be brutally honest with you, is what encourages you to improve and grow yourself. ... Brutal honesty, then, is neither a “good” or “bad” thing—it is simply a process in itself. It is “the way,” the path that allows for the most growth. (Copy/pasted from huffpost)

Honesty is almost always the best policy! You can be brutally honest around people you consider close or those who you care about, even though you think it hurts. But by being brutally honest sometimes you're taken as rude. ... However you should not go out of your way and hurt someone/ be mean in the name of 'Honesty'. (copy pasted from quora)

And that last sentence means otherwise, that's just going be a straight up rude person. There still a difference between being mean and answering someone correspondingly.