Search Results: things changed after sex

Optional explanation:
All what you know now, would be given to you before your birth (ignore the paradoxes for now). And you have the option to be born. Just as you were.
You cannot: ask for more info (well…you can, but you'd be told to fuck off and just make the choice), change for example your sex, retain any information after being born, or anything. Basically, if it's not stated you can do it, assume you cannot, because you can't.
The only thing you can, is to do informed choice if you want to be born. If not, you'd probably stay in some state you are in, whatever that may be. Or just…cease to exist. I guess. I don't know, you don't know.
Super optional bits of info, not related:
„return Results;“ is not GaG's error. I just have spend too much time coding and cannot not do that.
Justification for the category: I really don't know, where to put it, but I'd argue it's about society.

I have dated one girl in my life. For almost 6 years. Obviously we had sex, more than a few times. But she seriously messed me up after a while and then left. She's out of the picture. She got really just, toxic I guess, near the end.

I was raped shortly after we broke up, by several of her friends who were men. I didn't know them, she told me afterwards. That's how I know that. That's the jist of it...

I've had hell of a time moving on from the whole thing, and admittedly I've gotten pretty paranoid because of it all. I was already really insecure before all that, and needless to say that has dropped out the bottom of the bucket recently. So now here I am trying to get back into dating...

If a girl has been with other men-- even just one-- I get really.. nervous, I guess. I have a hard time believing she actually wants to be with me, and the paranoia kicks in. I am trying to get better about this but it feels like every time I think I might actually like someone again they turn out to have an ex, normally multiple, and even if they say they don't love their exes I know they would have told them otherwise. I'm in no position to be picky, but with girls like that I can't trust them...

And I KNOW that sounds ridiculous but if they're a virgin I know they are clean. And they don't know anyone but me like that. So they have no reason to lie to me about stuff like that. And there's plenty or other stuff that I won't get into because of length but I just feel stuck here. And at this point I'm not willing to change it.

So my question is: Does this make me a hypocrite? And if so, or if not, please tell me why in a comment? If you think something else, please say what and why... If you need more info let me know I'd be willing to give some.. thank you.