Search Results: into a male friend

I have been thinking about plutonic friendship between men and women. I know it can happen and work out in the long run for some people. However for myself, I rarely see it or experienced it. First of all I want to say that I'm a... Floater kind of friend. I have many different friends and have been accepted into their friend groups however I keep my distance plus I don't really like all the drama associated with the group drama. I am aware of it, I hope I don't ropped into them but if they ask my opinion I'll gladly give it. Now, I have been friends with women/girls growing up. The pattern I see is that once they get a boyfriend that they start ignoring and hanging out with me and or the group. I get it's a new relationship and it's fun and exciting. Spending time with each other is important but I don't understand this shift after like a year or so. Usually they are like absorbed in to their current boyfriends circle of friends. And the girls some times bring up her girl friends circle and mix. A part of me feel sad about not being included and I just grew up and accepted that is the fact of life? I get the stories of jealous boyfriends but... That just sounds like a bad relationship.

So right now, I have one best friend that is a woman. She's really chill. And I have five male best friends plus their group of girls that are their friends. I talk to the girls and we have hung out a little but their time is mostly around their boyfriends. Like we see them like maybe 4 times a year. However I have another best friend and their circle is tight. A bit of drama but they are more chill about hanging out with the guys and myself. Plus they are also in relationships but they kind of known each other from middle school. Not like they always been to school with each other but it just worked out? After college.

So I see both sides and it's interesting.
What's your experience?

I’ve been seeing this girl Chantel for just over a month. Chantel has made me really happy. She cooks for me everyday after work, massages me before bed, drove me around when my car failed, and offered to buy me a laptop 💻 if I go back to school. Chantel does a lot for me and always wants me at her house. We spend almost everyday day together. She even told her dad about me. Which she claims she hasn’t told her dad about anyone in years.

Things are going good, but. There’s a major issue. Her best friend is this guy named Godfrey. I don’t care if my girlfriend has male friends. But it’s just awkward when they’re super close.

Chantel n Godfrey have spent lots of time together in the past. She always talks about him and even calls/texts him often. She asked me if her relationship with Godfrey worries me. I didn’t respond because I think it’s too early in the relationship to talk about other guys. When I didn’t respond she said “you don’t have to worry about him. I’m not even attracted to him”. Since then, she’s hasn’t mentioned Godfrey as much.

About a week ago we went to a party at Godfreys and his friend made a joke about Godfrey smashing Chantel before we dated. Even Chantels own friends ask her if she’s ever had sex with Godfrey.

What’s makes me even more uncomfortable is that the she’s moving into the same apartment building as Godfrey. She said that’s the only place available rn. And that it’s just temporary. She gave me an extra set of keys and told I can come over whenever I want. I’m moving back home with my parents if I go back to school. She wants me to move in with her instead.

I like the my relationship with Chantel but her guy friend makes me very uncomfortable. I don't know if I break up immediately or give it some time.