Search Results: best friend ignoring me

I have been thinking about plutonic friendship between men and women. I know it can happen and work out in the long run for some people. However for myself, I rarely see it or experienced it. First of all I want to say that I'm a... Floater kind of friend. I have many different friends and have been accepted into their friend groups however I keep my distance plus I don't really like all the drama associated with the group drama. I am aware of it, I hope I don't ropped into them but if they ask my opinion I'll gladly give it. Now, I have been friends with women/girls growing up. The pattern I see is that once they get a boyfriend that they start ignoring and hanging out with me and or the group. I get it's a new relationship and it's fun and exciting. Spending time with each other is important but I don't understand this shift after like a year or so. Usually they are like absorbed in to their current boyfriends circle of friends. And the girls some times bring up her girl friends circle and mix. A part of me feel sad about not being included and I just grew up and accepted that is the fact of life? I get the stories of jealous boyfriends but... That just sounds like a bad relationship.

So right now, I have one best friend that is a woman. She's really chill. And I have five male best friends plus their group of girls that are their friends. I talk to the girls and we have hung out a little but their time is mostly around their boyfriends. Like we see them like maybe 4 times a year. However I have another best friend and their circle is tight. A bit of drama but they are more chill about hanging out with the guys and myself. Plus they are also in relationships but they kind of known each other from middle school. Not like they always been to school with each other but it just worked out? After college.

So I see both sides and it's interesting.
What's your experience?

I asked a question about something similar to this before.

A while ago she told me her and her best friend used to have history and have “fucked around before” (she said didn’t they didn’t have sex but he’s grabbed her boobs and I’m assuming made out or whatever)

and at first I was a little nervous that she’s best friends with a dude she’s done shit with before. But I trust her, and I decided I was being a little insecure due to being cheated on in my last relationship. So I forgot about it.

Today I was walking home with her and we were going back and forth with the little roasts/jokes we do. (We’re both sarcastic people, we’ll poke fun at each other sometimes)
And one it her responses to me was something along the lines of “Okay, I’ll kiss my best friend in front of you”

she was joking around but it was just a joke that was too real for me considering I already had concerns about her being attracted him..

And it was very out of nowhere. I don’t remember what I said but I remember not understanding the correlation of why she would bring him up.

I didn’t get mad at her or anything because I felt it was just something stupid I was overthinking about.
I just get nervous because my ex used to make “jokes” about having a second boyfriend and it turned out to be true...
So am I ignoring red flags or just being insecure?