myReview 1 mo

Sometime letting someone go is the right choice. (My Story)

Anonymous

Before I tell you why I let this girl go I have to tell you what this girl meant to me. She wasn't like anyone else I had might. She balances my life. She gives me a purpose. When times are rough just knowing that I get to see her the next day is enough. From time to time when I get that razor blade close to myself a single text message brings the light back. I was a boy who was scared to love, but after meeting her that wasn't an option. She is one in a billion. One and only.

When we were still talking I couldn't be there for her all the time. I was too caught up with my fame I was forgetting the important people in my life. I could tell she was lonely. Whenever I'm around her she felt less lonely but she didn't look happy. I couldn't make her happy like other people. I wanted to be that person who is by her side all the time but I couldn't. As we got older more boys started liking her. Boys that appreciates her more than I can. Of course I got jealous but I shouldn't have. One by one she rejected each and every one of them. It was because of me. I wanted to get in to a relationship with her but I was too scared; I was too insecure. Every time I saw her I wanted to tell her that I love her. One day I found out a boy likes her. Seeing him always around her and watching her always smiling I knew that I can't be the reason he's not with her. So I let her go. I cut off all communications. I ignored how. I left her life.

After we stopped talking every day it pained me. I wanted to talk to her and tell her the truth but I could see that she was happier. A few months later I started having doubts, maybe I was wrong. I started talking to her again. Talking to her felt right but I could tell that she wasn't interested in our conversations. In a few weeks show would eventually reject that boy then I decided that I would return back in to her life. Throughout the year we stopped talking to each other and started talking to each other again.

When we started to talk to each other again I tried not to let those insecure feelings get to me but it was getting harder and harder as more people started liking her. Then I did the same thing again. I stopped talking to her like I did before. This time I was forgiven quickly. This wasn't the end though. The feelings proceeded to happen and then I did the same things again. She was hurt. When I tried to fix things again she told me that we should stay friends. Deep down I knew that it would be the best but instead I kept on trying. The longer I stayed in her life the more hurt she gets, I was a poison to her. I knew that she couldn't let me go so I had to let her go one last time. I was too toxic for her. I wasn't the right person for her.

After I let her go more and more people started talking to her. She made more and more friends, she was less lonely now. She found a boy that really likes her and that really appreciates her. She found a boy that can make her feel happy and not alone; something that I could never do. Every time I see them just chatting a part of me dies.

The right choice. Some people said that I did it because I was jealous. Maybe they are right but deep down I know that they are wrong. Now the girl that gave me purpose has found someone that makes her happy like I never can. I'm broken and hurt. I'm jealous and dying. I'm scared that I will never find someone like her again. I'm scared of walking down that lonely path and knowing that she is in someone else's arms. All my dreams are broken and my heart has just been broken in to pieces. I'm trying to find a purpose to live but I can't. Then I remember that she is happy and if she is happy then I am; even if this happiness was momentary.

Sometime letting someone go is the right choice. (My Story)
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Most Helpful Girl

  • imlost_gb
    I feel for you, I really do but I don't think you were jealous. I actually think you were protecting her from what you thought was "not good enough", and you somehow convinced yourself you were doing her a favor but from the sounds of it, you ended up messing up. It sounds like you intentionally (cause I did this too when I was younger) would ruin my relationships because I always thought they deserved better than me, they were gonna leave me so I had to leave them first, and let me tell you, that way of thinking will turn into resentment towards yourself. I don't think you did the right thing because you never got to experience and actually feel happy, this happiness you're feeling isn't what love is, love is giving each other a chance and if that relationship HURTS both of you then THAT's not meant to be for both of you, but I can see that you have insecurities and doubts and you didn't even give her the chance to make you stop thinking that way. I'm very sorry you feel like you need to justify your fear, you deserve to be happy. Whether it's with her or with someone else, I really hope that one day you and her can revisit your "us" situation and be truthful, because if you love someone you want to be as clear as you can be for them. She must've wondered, "does he like me?" because lemme tell you but if you really did like/love her you wouldn't have caused her pain, not trying to pin this on you but the fears in your head. I hope you know you are capable of making someone feel loved and like they're at the top of the world.
    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      Thank you so very much, I think I know how to deal with this problem now.

    • imlost_gb

      Remember, go in with a positive mindset and if things don't work out, it's not the end of the world, I probably lost the guy I love so much but I'm willing to let him go for my mental health. Remember, you got this, how you react and how you act on this situation depends on you. You can do it (:

Most Helpful Guy

  • ItsTheNephilim
    Touching story dude 😊. You had your time in the beginning where you could have confessed your love for her and you could have been great together! But this is what overthinking and insecurity does to you: makes you miss out on many good things coming your way and makes you push them away. This girl had all kinds of right feelings for you then. But when you once cut all your contact with her, it must've taken a toll on her and probably she could not have been able trust you after that. Staying friends in such conditions is just another way of saying 'We really aren't compatible together but I'm too attached to still let you go' and that maybe be convenient at the moment but leads to disarters later. When you cut someone out of your life, make sure you do it good and never contact them again. Whatever she must have felt for you might be real. But life happens and things go on. Who knows there is someone out there waiting for you? You just have to look and things might fall in place. Good luck to you and that girl! :)
    Cheers to love! 🥂
    Is this still revelant?
    • Anonymous

      Thank you man this meant a lot.

    • @CarolineFape fuck off

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What Girls & Guys Said

71
  • TruthBringer
    Even though I haven't experienced it the way you did, I can relate to your pain and disappointment. I also very much loved a girl who I had to let go. It's a different story, but it took me nearly 2 years to fully get over that relationship. Despite me being the one who initiated the break up.

    Unlike others here, I believe you did the RIGHT thing by letting her go. And it's mostly the right thing for you. And here is why:

    Love is a powerful thing. It can make you blind and naive. The mistake we BOTH made is making a girl being the one who gives us purpose and drive. This is not only a turn off to them intrinsicly, but also a huge blow to our own lives. This is your life. You are a man. You have to set goals for yourself and work your way towards them. Be ambitious. Learn self love. Work on your physical strength. This way will you not only boost your own confidence, find meaning in life, but also don't depend your happiness on someone else. People come and go. Lovers come and go. You will always have yourself. And that's why you have to find happiness within your own life. A wise person once said "Happiness is hard to find within ourselves and impossible outside".

    Now that girl may be gone, but there is a positive side to her being gone. She was holding you back. Holding you back from your own self development. You were losing yourself while loving her.

    Also, you HAVE TO REALISE that you gave her more value than she has given you. Don't you see? She moved on to other people while YOU are still stuck thinking about her. Where is your self respect? Where is your dignity? I'm talking to you this way because I wish someone could have talked to me this way. Don't repeat my mistake!!!

    You have to realize she was no good to your life. No matter how many fun moments you had. We all have fun moments with everyone. SHE IS NOT SPECIAL. You have to start the process of letting her go. Learn to accept she is gone and that you don't want her back.

    I used to be so heartbroken, but now, I do NOT want anything to do with my ex. I'm glad she is out of my life. I found my purpose. I am fulfilling my dream. If I stayed with my ex, I wouldn't have applied for fighter pilot training. Which has always been my dream. Because I revolved my future plans around her. Soon I'll be flying F-35s. And that's thanks to the fact that I kicked my ex out of my life. And now, I'm with another wonderful girl who is willing to join ME in the US for the upcoming 2 years.

    Be happy for yourself. Not for her. She isn't thinking about you. Move on. Let her go. Don't be a weak beta male.
    • Anonymous

      I'm happy that you found the right person and thank you for your service.

  • Scropgirl
    I still think you shouldn’t have let her go. I don’t think anyone would love her as much as you do. You ignoring her might have hurt her so much if he is in love with you. If you really like her.. you will definitely make time for her.. you will be there for her no matter what. It’s all about priorities. It is quite normal to get scared of attachments. But I’m sure she would understand that and will help you through.
    • Anonymous

      I tried giving her my attention and time but sometimes it's just too ignoring. I can't seem to find the right amount of attention. Sometimes when I talk to her she just doesn't seem in to the conversation, but if I stop talking to her then she would take it personally. I really wish I had talked to her about it.

  • Poppykate
    Love is about patience, tolerance, understanding, kindness and selflessness. Try to learn these skills before going into another relationship.
    • Poppykate

      I think that if you really wanted to make it work, you would have move mountains. But perhaps deep down you didn’t feel that it was right.

    • Anonymous

      I had my doubts but at the time I thought it was right.

  • Smarxy06
    She may have been your lesson to experience something you were not used to, but I commend you for letting her go. I think of myself as someone successful, nurturing, and funny and many men have ghosted me many times over the years thinking they would find better only to return and keep doing the same thing. You stopped being selfish and allowed her to be happy. I’m the future you will find that love she gave you again but you did a great thing letting her go so that she can experience the love and effort. I do believe if you were capable of reciprocating, you guys would have been together today, but no need to dwell on the past
    • Anonymous

      Thank you that meant a lot.

    • imlost_gb

      girl I feel you on that nurturing part! woo! this arsehole told me "you're funny, beautiful, smart" bruh stfu just say you don't want me anymore and move on! I'm gonna message him this one thing hopefully he'll stop flirting with me cause I'm too messed up from him, I love him but I'm a realist and truthfully, I'm not interested in being played.

  • Hangry22
    That's really sad and i can relate. Whenever i sync with a guy, my insecurites and fear of love comes to the surface. I want to let that person go because he deserves a good person who will make him happy. But soon after, i regret it and want that person for myself. But most often , i don't follow my selfish wish. I advice him and show them many good options out there for him to be happy. I know how it feels to smile upon seeing a guy's text when you were just crying and depressed. If i start to fall in love with a guy, i don't pray for us to be together but that he finds someone great and good and will be happy forever because he deserves it. Just like you, i get momentary happiness. There's a high chance i maybe writing such a story in a few years
    • Anonymous

      How do you move on from those guys?

    • Hangry22

      It's just one guy. He is "the one that got away". I don't think you can move on from that completely. Each time i get a call or message from an unknown person, i think what if it's him. He is the only one i thought was worth the heartbreak and time. I will be hurt if he finds a girl and will be sad thinking why i can't be his forever girl. When you put distance and don't try to indulge into his life, it helps. But it's easily triggered by any topic associated with him. Then i suddenly crave for him to be with me. Even though we talked for hours each day, there're still things i wanted to know more about. I can only hope i made an impact on his heart

  • whatdoyouwantt
    I don’t understand you people. You love someone but want them to be happy without you as you aren’t good for them. When they finally find happiness, you are feeling devastated. Smh next time treat a girl righy
  • Anonymous
    I didn’t really bother reading it entirely, but from what I understood is that you are so insecure and you weren’t man enough to start a proper relationship with her? Sounds pretty standard LOL.
  • Anonymous
    I didn’t read all this but I let many a guy go, so many more out there to have fun with in life
    • imlost_gb

      firstly; wtf did you just say i didn't understand it. secondly; that's good for you now let him find an actual good reason instead of being bitter like your comment.

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