Search Results: he only shows up when he has no girlfriend

I was with my 1st for 5 yrs. We were best friends! I'd do anything for him! He wasn't bad to me,but wasn't as good as I knew he could be. I felt he took me for granted. We were both at fault for the break up, arguing, I was insecure/jealous, he didn't like to go out & got overly comfortable with me. He hit a stressful part in his life/was under pressure & decided to end it. When he broke up with me, it was hard for him, we were both crying, He begged me not to hate him! Kept sayin he was so sorry,etc. He asked if we could be single for little bit & work it out later.

I took this EXTREMELY hard. We Broke up April 09. Kept in contact, I only contacted him for financial obligations, or to cuss/yell at him. I was HURT,ANGRY,SAD, ETC! I could NOT get a hold of my emotions!

In feb '10 a good guy friend tells me he's interested in me physically. This is NOT my character at ALL! I thought if I did it, my feelings/pain for my EX would go away. I only felt worse! I sent my friend "pics" during this time. In March'10 I met a new guy.We were not phsyical, mainly talked on the phone, hungout occasionally,nothin to serious.

Me & my EX still talked. I was usually a B*tch to him. He said he understood the anger. One night he asked me to send him "pics" I refuse. He went online in my picture mail to get pics I sent him in the past & found the pics I sent my friend. He called me upset,questioning me, I confessed/explained & cried to him I was messed up. At this point, I just wanted to be honest, I told him I was talking to a new guy (who happens to have the same name as him!) He was devastated & said we could never work it out! Even through all this he still texted me. I was still bitter with him. When I'm hurt I hide feelings, I still loved him, but didn't want him to see that.

One of his good girl-friends had been staying with him since around the time we broke up,in his new house that WE were going to share.Only when she had to work in the area. This always bothered me!She was gay,but It still didn't sit right with me. Id question it, He swore they were just friends.She had just broke up with her girlfriend.

Jan'11 I hear my EX has a girlfriend. I ask him & its true.Yes..the gay girl! I ask why he didn't tell me. He didn't want me to hate him! Said he still had feelings/loved me. He said it just happened. He cried sayin he's messed up from what I did & it seemed I moved on. I cry sayin I thought he was going to come back for me.He said he tried,but I show no feelings! He had said we could never work it out! How was I supposed know?! He wishes I told him how I really felt all this time!

They been together 6 months.He says this is a mess! I realize my behavior was misleading.He said he doesn't want to tell me to wait, but we never know what the future holds. All my feelings/emotions have resurfaced! I kinda feel bad talking to him now, even tho HE NEVER stopped contact.Idk what to do!Bad timing! Karma got me! I'm so confused! I Love this guy!