The thing is I've dealt with a lot in my past, which has pretty much caused me to suffer depression these days, and I'm battling to overcome it, I barely have any friends at the moment or any outlook towards a career as I am lost where to start,I know attributes such as insecurity, over self consciousness are unattractive towards a woman. But I don't have a group of friends only individual close friends who aren't party sort of people.
I'm finding it extremely difficult to even meet new people because majority people of my age at 18 are all into partying,drinking and what not, I'd take up volunteering if I knew where to start. I'm 60KG and 5"11 and I guess it doesn't help, I been going to the gym for 2 years and all I gained was tone and still stuck at my weight which still bothers me to this day, a lot of people my age I've met are not very interested in talking to me or even inviting me to hang out or even trying to involve me, I don't understand it, I've been told I'm a generous, great, friendly and a well respectful nice caring guy by a lot of people, but no one barely shows any interest in getting to know or involve me.
I've even been told I was cute by a few attractive girls but I wouldn't of known whether to believe it or not as I've been told I had a big nose, and that I'm aware I have a bald spot on the side of my head,ugly teeth and an under bite which doesn't help my self esteem, I've been told I'm ugly by a few people too. Sometimes I see myself in the mirror and think who would want to date me, I realized a lot of people my age are dating, jumping from relationship to relationship, and I wonder what's going to happen to a guy like me who's not getting any younger but older and doesn't know where to start. I know I don't want to sound like a downer but I can't help it rather than express my feelings. I've pursued girls before and all I faced was rejection, and cruelty, I've been called a stalker and as well as had a girl pretended to show interest in me but then realized she just used me to do favors for her instead.
I got bullied since start of primary/elementary school till end of high school, my parents got divorced and my father is uncaring, pretty much I could write a book about my past which mostly was miserable. I barely have any friends only 2-3 close friends who are stuck in a similar situation, I could write a few other things which bother me and restrict me meeting new people but I won't bother.
I know that there's a saying that I have to learn to love myself first before anybody can love me, but I'm getting impatient, majority of the times I am lonely which makes me depressed, I fear that it might be too late for a guy like me who has so many issues to deal with. I don't understand what I've done to deserve all of this and having to see others happiness just crushes me..
Most Helpful Opinions
There are other people like you, I bet, who's been through a lot.
Don't worry when approaching a girl or feel inadequate with yourself. That sort of thing makes a whole awkward feel to the situation. If you go through with confidence, you've got a more likely chance.
I'm not going to go judging though because I've been through a lot too and all I am is nervous. I can usually make friends and nothing else.
I mean, no ones perfect right? I'm always putting myself down, which is really horrible! And you shouldn't do it. I mean, who cares if you have a few extra pounds, are bald, aren't muscular or smart. The only people who care are the people behind the few extra pounds, the baldness, etc... and the low lives that think they're too good to be around us.
I've known that for a fact, sometimes, people who've been through a lot are vulnerable and need someone by their side. They then don't look for looks or anything, just how they act towards you.
So, by your personality, I think you aren't being rejected for your interior but your exterior.
Truthfully? I'd go out with you.
I have problems too but I keep a smile on and I'm okay with people. Not overly awesome with them. Haha, But I've got enough to try and get rid of someone else's problems.
There's a good chance when two people with problems get together they neutralize each others problems and nothing hardly seems horrible anymore.