Why are women so against the concept of paternity tests?

[HawkPerception]

Updates

1 mo

It should be made mandatory and this prevents the so called "insulted" scenario from arising in the first place.

[Crimsyjo]

I was thinking women shouldn't have a problem if innocent and confident. In fact it's a great "told you so" moment.

But then I started thinking. It's understandable that a woman who secretly cheated might fear it but sometimes tests are wrong. If that happens an innocent woman could have her life upturned and wrongly accused. That happened to me. Not on paternity but a cocaine test. It's incredibly devastated and infuriating to know 100% your innocent and have people go "well, the tests are really accurate. You must be guilty"

But anyways. I cleared my name on that one eventually.

Also I guess it comes down to trust too.. of a man demands a paternity test and is hounding you for no good reason calling you a cheat when you are not then that's abuse behaviour territory and the issue isn't really the paternity test but the reasons around it.

If a woman did something even if innocent that might cause a man doubt? I think she can both be upset but also not hate the test. Just accept it as something that most likely will at least put to bed whatever doubts the man has. I think it's also on the man to approach it the right way because if he just says it's soneyhung he needs fir peace of mind and not badger the woman thats better because otherwise a good result doesn't undo all the angst around it.

[sawno]

For me the inaccurate test story was with my ex when we finally could meet each other when the lockdowns were starting to lift. She still needed a test to get back to her country, I didn't. I had warned her prior and I had to leave a day earlier since my boat left that evening and her plane the following morning.

When I woke up I got a text that she was devastated because she tested positive and now had to be alone in quarentine for a while. I told her not to worry yet and get a second test done since i knew they were unreliable. She did and tested negative, she missed her flight because of it all but was home only half a day later than planned.

In the end? Neither of us got sick despite sharing food. The first test probably had picked up a remnant as she did have it a month prior.

So with these kinda tests if she insists that she is innocent i'd be open to a second opinion. But I would not expect it to be wrong twice.

[Crimsyjo]

@sawno yeah definitely! You never know what variables might effect a test. Bad batch or something. So another test to confirm is always a good idea.

[Crimsyjo]

@HawkPerception I agree with update. Maybe hospitals upon birth just mandatoryily confirm paternity. Or maybe as part of birth certificate process before a man can add his name he has to prove paternity unless signing a declaration he waivers the right (as some men willingly clan a child not their own). I think if ot becomes just part of procedure it does two things - becomes routine so no blame on either side for suggesting it. It just becomes natural order. And it also should make women less willing to cheat or at least get pregnant cheating. Which yes why should women not cheat and men not be accountable? But then a cheating man risks exposure if a non cheating woman has his baby and hospital confirms this automatically through dna on record.

[HawkPerception]

@Crimsyjo Thank you for having sense

[thegreenyogi]

It triggers their insecurities I guess and in some cases I think it makes them feel powerless and not blindly trusted.

[bolverk]

Why are women so against the concept of paternity tests?
Women who are voicing their negativity against paternity tests are the ones who know their children might not have been fathered by their husbands, they know their children are theirs, but the husband has no guarantee that the children he has raised are biologically his.
Most paternity test labs report that about 1/3 of their paternity tests have a ‘negative’ result. Of all the possible fathers who take a paternity test, about 32% are not the biological father.
WHAT THESE WOMEN ARE CONCERNED ABOUT IS THAT THEIR INFIDELITIES WILL BE EXPOSED.

[OlderAndWiser]

Why are so many people opposed to the concept of accounability?

[OlderAndWiser]

Thanks for MHO!

[DishLady]

I don't think "Women" are against it specifically, especially if they're honest about having multiple partners. Some courts will suggest it if the gal is trying to get child support and there's a general question about her... activities.

Having said that, it's certainly an insulting request a paternity test from a woman who has been faithful to the guy (or has only been with the one guy) while he's scrambling to get out of paternal obligations.

I know someone who's MIL asked for the test every time on penalty of cutting the couple out of her will. That was a really nasty thing to do.

[Finchie40]

Because they feel like they aren’t trusted by their partner, by him requesting a paternity test. Think how you would feel if guys’ were the ones carrying the baby and his partner didn’t trust him , and demanded a paternity test , or she requested you to go on Maury lol

[Apple1996]

Because it shows he doesn't trust his woman. Relationships are built on trust so if a man is questioning that big of a thing then they might as well not even be together.

[Chazmatazz269]

Because they cheat and don’t want to face accountability.

[AviatorTom]

That would only happen if the woman is insecure, and afraid it might reveal something she doesn't want anyone to know.

[LazerBean]

I'm not against them, my husband can get one if he wants and I have told him so. I know he won't though, because only hoes worry about such things and he's not a hoe.

If you're talking about mandated paternity tests, then many people are against them simply because they are not so extremely liberal as to want government mandates on their children and their DNA.

If you're talking about just in general, then for the same reason that men are so against women requiring regular STD tests from their men and having free access to their phones.

[HawkPerception]

I'd be happy to do an STD test for my partner and I always give my partners fingerprint access to my phone. I have no issues with being transparent in a relationship. Worries about STDs are completely justified.

That's not even close to comparable to mandatory paternity tests.

[LazerBean]

It is very comparable because they are the same.

Why does a man want a paternity test? Because he is not sure that his partner has not cheated on him.

Why would a woman require her partner to regularly get STD tested during their relationship? Because she is not sure that he is not cheated on him.

Why would a woman want to go through her man's phone regularly? Because she is not sure that he has not cheated on her.

They are all the same act of distrust.

[HawkPerception]

Even if they are the comparable (which they aren't), there are a lot of men who lie about not having an STD before having sex. Even if my partner trusts me, why would I not want to give them absolute peace of mind? I'd happily do it if they asked me. It's the same thing for paternity tests. It should not be as big a deal as you're making it out to be.

[HawkPerception]

And it's the same thing when it comes to prenups. It's not saying that the intention is to go into marriage expecting divorce. It's just safeguarding yourself in the case that a divorce does happen.

[HawkPerception]

It doesn't matter how much I trust or love my partner. I will always get a prenup.

[LazerBean]

Good on you for not being a hypocrite. I hope you find a partner that is accepting of your distrust as you are accepting of theirs.

[HawkPerception]

Yeah I don't think you're getting it 😂

[LazerBean]

Oh I get it, and I don't blame you for your denial.

[Smegskull]

I like the STD comparison though I don't know many men against STD tests. I would probably complain about the time and cost of frequent full STD tests but the principal is sound.

I don't think the phone comparison works though, there are plenty of things on my phone I wouldn't want my partner to see that are nothing to do with cheating...

[RavVid]

Because they can see themselves cheating and being caught out by a DNA test.

Lets face it. If a woman would never cheat she couldn't get pregnant to a man other than her partner. And if she thought that way, she wouldn't support women who do.

[molonski2]

They are against it bcoz they are scared of the truth and pass it off in passive - aggressive BS , it really should be mandatory, too many men have suffered , far too many men deceived.


Good question Hawk.

[molonski2]

UPDATE = How many men have died incorrectly? While hanging from a rope with a fraudulent child support form in his hand? It's life and death..
And it's horrendous what is going on..

I had a mate in Australia do this directly , and the Mrs was a Skanky Ho

[LiamJHayden]

Some because they find it insulting. Others because they know that the guy might not be the dad, but the other option (s) are less desirable financially.

In reality it should be done because hospitals do mix up kids sometimes. There are cases where the guy gets it done and he is not the father, then the woman who was faithful gets tested and discovers she is not the mother.

[Theunfadeable]

Because if paternity test become commonplace, the scam is over. I’ve seen stats that said 30% of children don’t belong to the father on the birth certificate. Ancestry. com is already leading to a lot of hoes getting kicked out of a lot of houses because they’re being exposed. There’s a lot of provision and government benefits to be lost so they’re going to fight it tooth and nail.

[Zack-Bann]

Because it’s rarely for them
If they didn’t have multiple partners they know it for certain
And if they did and want to hide it they’ll be defensive.


It’s like when you’re a kid and a chocolate goes missing and your mom says “open your mother and show me your tongue”
Guilty or innocent you won’t like it because you already know the answer so you feel offended by the mistrust.

[MissSunshine2]

If it were me in that situation, I would be hurt, appalled and offended that my partner needs evidence after all I've done for him that I'm not cheating on him.

[HawkPerception]

It happens so often to men where the woman has kids with another man and then the man ends up raising kids who aren't his unknowingly. It's not a matter of trust. It should simply be a mandatory procedure. Take your feelings out of it and look at it objectively. What would be fair to men and women?

[MissSunshine2]

Trusting each other until given a reason not to.

[HawkPerception]

Women have the benefit of knowing 100% it's their kid. But men, even if they trust their partner 100%, aren't 100% sure. Why would you not want there to be a procedure that makes your partner go from believing to knowing? It just gives men absolute peace of mind.

[MissSunshine2]

Honestly, I think couples should have to sit a bar exam based on IQ testing before they are granted the right to procreate, judging by the number of stupid people in the world. I think that should be what takes priority.

[HawkPerception]

I actually agree with you on that, but that's going off on a large tangent.

[Lliam]

A man obviously doesn't trust his partner 100% if he's not 100% sure she didn't cheat and get knocked up by another guy and then lie to his face about it.
So he is delivering the greatest insult so suggest that he wants proof from her.

She would be justified in thinking he is the kind of guy who is incapable of trust and is therefore untrustworthy, himself.

[HawkPerception]

@Lliam Gonna have to disagree with you there bud.

[MissSunshine2]

@Lliam I agree with you

[HawkPerception]

@Lliam Oh no... you validated her opinion on it 😂

[Wodens_Apprentice]

Why should men trust women exactly again?

[Lliam]

@Wodens_Apprentice. Then why should women trust men? It's a sickness to be incapable of trust or to recognize trustworthiness. Such people are destined to live miserable lives.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

@Lliam Because are more honest, rational and exposed to less sex then women are. If a man gets dumped he has to wait years for his next relationship whereas these foids usually can't wait a week until they're spreading their legs for another man.
Women really like to cuckold their men.

[MissSunshine2]

@Wodens_Apprentice that’s actually really offensive and sexist. A lot of women can go much longer without thinking about or having sex than most men can.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

@MissSunshine2 Going longer without thinking about sex doesn't translate to having more of it. Women have way more access to sex. How do you think there's a whole incel epidemic to begin with?
The only men having more sex then women are the small percent of men who women choose are worth fucking. Those men usually get fed up of these women for a nicer or prettier princess in which case she later settles in her 30's for some simp nice guy type who waited his turn like a cuck.
Whilst autists like me are meant to just die and get deleted from the genepool just because I'm more honest then most of the evil normies on society.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

@MissSunshine2 It's only our stupid laws and civilisation that has prevented me from smashing mens skulls in & taking concubines. So when it comes to nature a clever 6'4'' guy like me would've been on top, but it gets suppressed by our pathetic Marxist Christian matriarchal culture.

[MissSunshine2]

@Wodens_Apprentice you sound very insecure. Why not just pursue the people you want? We all feel insecure, used and rejected at times. I get that some people have all the bad luck though, some more than others.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

I was rejected by society at large itself for being autistic. I was also massively betrayed at some point by every friend I've ever had.
Every woman who's showed an interest in me ends up finding me too autistic to be compatible or in one case was an excessively mentally ill emotional vampire.
So yes, but in my case there becomes a point where insecurity manifests itself into something far more powerful.

[MissSunshine2]

@Wodens_Apprentice that must suck. I openly admit that I’ve had pretty bad luck up until recently. The irony is now I’ve finally met someone worth my time romantically that I like and respect, I can’t act on it until I graduate. Too much work to do and it wouldn’t be professional right now.

[MissSunshine2]

Maybe you just need to meet the right person? If there isn’t a person who feels right for you? Then from my personal experiences in the past with other men I dated at the time, you’re always better off alone than miserable.

[MissSunshine2]

There is indeed such a feeling as feeling alone and rejected in a relationship and that sucks a lot more than being single. I learnt to be more afraid of marriage to the wrong person and being stuck with them forever than being alone. I am Autistic too by the way, mild Asperger’s, I couldn’t get a date until my late teens as I was a pimply greasy haired pot bellied nerd with braces and it took until my thirties to start to really have a clue about who I was or about life in general. You’re not alone.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

Being a woman who can't get a date means waiting until your late teens. Do you know what men like me would give to have had romance in our teens? Sperg men like me are to be left until our 30's to lose our virginity because all the youthful prettier girls are going out with vain, simple people as they find intelligence off severely off putting for some reason, even if they never admit it.
You gotta be some absolute prince Charming or you're gonna have to settle with a woman who has racked up a body count or face looking like a paedophile for targeting girls in their late teens.
Yes I absolutely am alone. If I wasn't along I wouldn't have tried to throw myself infront of a car recently. If you don't even want friends anymore & you have nothing to live for, why would I continue to live my life which for me has been a life of constant embarrassment and shame because the stupid fucking education system constantly highlighted my autism to everyone.
I don't care about other men (there's certainly no women, especially not attractive ones) going through the same thing as me as quite frankly humanity itself doesn't deserve my sympathy for how I've been treated in the past.
Women can snap their fingers and have a man if they really put their minds to it, even the unattractive ones. If a man like me wants women I have to act like a "sexual predator" and hope they find it attractive otherwise carry on being invisible and one despite being a 6'4'' attractive person.
If you're 37 my advice is you focus on starting a family over your career, because women's fertility begins to dramatically tank around that age.
I'm not settling for a normal life anymore myself. I'd rather die gloriously like a lion then put up with the constant humiliation ritual which has been my life.

[MissSunshine2]

@Wodens_Apprentice do you think maybe you need to get some medication? I wasn’t attempting to brag about my life. Apparently it has been easier than yours, but I’ve had all kinds of struggles in various areas of my life, similar to yours until my thirties. I may or may not have mentioned my own issues with depression, dependant personality disorder, anxiety disorder, learning disorder and Asperger’s syndrome oh and I’m a recovered alcoholic by the way. So while my life might have been marginally easier than yours, it didn’t turn out much better until my thirties.

[MissSunshine2]

I’m not trying to patronise you. I’m saying I needed medication for similar reasons in the past and I still take depression pills and get really bad once a year. Very sad.

[MissSunshine2]

I was unhappy for years and I got better through years of hard work and picking myself up and trying again.

[MissSunshine2]

Things can definitely get better. I didn’t mention this earlier because I don’t like to complain and I felt exposed.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

@MissSunshine2 Thank you for being supportive. I hope you have a wonderful relationship with the right man.

[MissSunshine2]

@Wodens_Apprentice you’re welcome and thank you too. Things do get better but some of us, like you and I, have to fight a bit harder to make that happen.

[MissSunshine2]

Believe me, it’s worth the fight.

[MissSunshine2]

I hope that hearing my story as an example of someone who found themselves in a similar situation for many adult years and their teens helps you somehow. I didn’t make any of it up or exaggerate.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

@MissSunshine2 It's okay. I come across harsh on text but I'm just blunt and very critically minded.

[VioletHaze]

It would hurt that my partner thinks me capable of such a thing. I'd do it but our relationship wouldn't be the same.

[VioletHaze]

Am I against the concept of paternity tests? Not at all. If a man has reasonable doubt, he should ask for one.

And if it was the norm or standard practice, Id have no issues taking one. Its the accusation that stings.

[sawno]

I think it being mandatory would solve a lot of that, helps catch the cheaters while simultaneously not accusing anyone. I don't see it being invasive either if done right, I assume a little dna sample from both the baby and father would do after which the dna evidence can be destroyed for privacy.

[HawkPerception]

It's not about whether the guy thinks you're capable of it or not. Women have the benefit of knowing 100% it's their kid because it comes from your bodies. But with men, even if we think we know 100%, it's still not 100%. If you know it's his kid, you should be happy to prove it and give him absolute peace of mind, making him go from 99.99% sure to 100%.

Same thing goes for if women want a man to get an STD test. There are many men that lie about not having one, so even if you trust him, isn't it just better to have him get it done for absolute peace of mind? I'd be happy to do one for my partner if they ask me to.

[VioletHaze]

If I had a kid with someone, it would be in an established relationship. You usually do not ask for an STD test that late into a relationship. Trust has been built, character has been established.

If he asked that of me, itd take some time to get past that. Unless it was an OCD thing. Then I'd do it for his peace of mind and be understanding.

[VioletHaze]

@sawno Yes I find I agree. You can even take prenatal paternity tests. We do all kinds of prenatal testing. Why not add that one as well.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

Yeah I bet you'll only have children once your eggs start to dry up and you justify it using monetary reasons.
Why wouldn't trust women when they're constantly fucking around and it's not like the man can even get to tell if it's his child or notz like the woman can.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

Oh a fellow INFJ 👀

[sawno]

@Wodens_Apprentice There are multiple, I am an INFJ as well but more of an INFJ-INTP hybrid.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

@sawno I'm the kingly type of druid.

[Wodens_Apprentice]

@sawno Also INFJ is meant to be rarer which is why INFJ's flex it

[yulbsari]

If she isn't lying about the pregnancy, then what's the problem? Too many guys have been trapped and screwed. Once a woman is pregnant she goes into protection mode. She will do anything to create the environment SHE thinks is best for her and her child. The guy with the most resources will be the target... not the dad.

[WhitneySnow]

We’re not. Individual women may not want one whether they’re guilty or innocent, but the majority of women are not against them as a concept. I’m not.

[HawkPerception]

That's false. Surveys indicate approximately 68% of women are against it.

[WhitneySnow]

Mandatory paternity tests only benefit the man. What about the woman who gets careless and sleeps with a guy who makes a terrible provider and a worse parent? That really hurts the child, who would be much better off as her husband’s child (though when they’re old enough of course they should be allowed the opportunity to get to know their natural father)?

[HawkPerception]

You can't be serious... you basically implied it's good to lie about if the man's kid is his...

[worldscolide]

Because it forced them to be accountable for their cheating.

No joke, almost 50% of paternity tests sent to dna testing come back as the husband not being the father.

Those who are against it have something to hide.

[NathanDavis]

because trust should be honest... and not forced

[andreasderjuengere]

A DNA test may show that these women made poor mating choices.

[_Jenny_]

@HawkPerception only if I’m not sure who the baby daddy is

[Miristheiss]

They do not like consequences.

[Cidknee]

They want their infidelity kept hidden.

[Jupiter1]

Simply afraid that their lies will be exposed.

[beenherebefore]

Because they know what they done.

[ThisSiteSux]

Because 70% of woman don't know who the father is.

[blackeagle007]

Women are famous for cheating

[jimbob70]

The result