Search Results: he wants to take it really slow

I’m 31, happy and content with my life, but wouldn’t mind finding my companion in life.

I’ve been single for 10 months now, after leaving a very controlling ex, so a little cautious and want to take things slow with future dates.

I’ve started communicating with a guy online. I contacted him, as he seemed like a mature and incredibly interesting guy.

He instantly suggested swapping numbers and texting.

His texts are very few and far between, sometimes 2-3days go by before I hear from him.

I initiate texts just as much as he does, if not more.

He told me that he’s not good at texting, and prefers talking in person, or on the phone. He also stated to be very busy, working long hours.

We’ve spoken twice on the phone now (in total over 2 weeks). He’s a lot more talkative on the phone than he is in his texts, and we seem to get on well, each conversation lasting over an hour.

Yet at the end of each conversation, he doesn’t make any suggestions about when we should talk next.

In one text, he did suggest meeting for a coffee, or talking on the phone - I opted for talking on the phone rather than a coffee. I’m a bit hesitant, given my previous experiences with my ex. I’m really interested in getting to know him better, but want to take things very slow.

I’d want to talk a bit more before explaining this to him (I don’t want to share too much too soon), but the problem is, his texts are so sporadic, and it’s always me who has to suggest booking in a time to talk on the phone.

I’m used to guys who are more forward. So I instantly assume that his sporadic communication indicate lack of interest.

Any tips? Insight, or advice on how to explain my reasoning for wanting to take it slow when it comes to meeting in person?

OK if it were me. I would probably mean something like ' I want to be with him but take things slow, maybe be friends for a while first, or just date and go real slow... '

But i'm not him he's not me, and i do not want to assume. He was pretty nervous and unsure when saying that, so I do not really want to force him to break things down it atm. I might ask him about it in a while from now.

Do you think is it just a way of saying back off?

Should I leave him alone, or ask about it in a few weeks?

Things have been confusing between us, timing really bad. He asked me out and (things happening over the year and a half, i have not been perfect nor he but trying and it is too long to explain but it was frustrating and finally I was not sure if he was playing games) I finally just got tired of mixed messages and asked him what he wanted.

by the way, I am happy to take things slow be friends etc. So this is not a problem for me and I have no need to pressure I just want to understand, it is confusing.