Search Results: taking sides in a fight

I met him almost 9 years ago. We had a rough start to "us". Dating and having a fall out shortly later (like most high schoolers), lost touch for awhile and then came back together; but never giving up on eachother, in a sense. We always stayed in contact. For the past 3 years we have been the best of friends; though seeing eachother has been rough since our work schedules prevent it. But we speak daily; most of the time all day. I have been in love with him since I was 16 but it has been a rocky road to travel. He is extremely emotionally guarded and very rarely will he let his tough exterior soften for a moment to let someone get to know him. That is, with everyone aside from me. I know him like its my second nature; and he knows me the same. He told me he loved me in February; a drunken text sent late at night. Then told me the next day that he had meant it. However, he lets his fear of me leaving prevent him from taking anything further. In fact he has always let his fear of anyone leaving control his entire life. All his relationships being brief and short lived.
I went to see him this past weekend after being apart for a solid 8 months. He was having a house party for the McGregor vs Mayweather fight. He was all over me; to say the least. Very affectionate. Kissing and hugging me in front of all of his friends (which is a rarity for him as he is very reserved). Kept telling me how happy he was that I was there; the whole 9 yards. Now most people would say "Why not go for it? He obviously likes you". I know he does. However, the depth of his emotional unavailability is endless. He let's you in just enough to see the darker side of him and then cuts you off when you are too close. I know there may be a chance; later down the road that is. But there are endless hoops to jump through. He is worth it to me. He truly is. But would you, in my position, keep jumping at the expense of this man? Any advice is appreciated.