Polls: Dating

And for the ladies, please answer from a female perspective

He was away at college, that is where I knew him from. We were kinda friendly acquaintances, but generally had some low key sexual tension. He began to express more clearly that he was interested in exploring that side with me. I told him I was seeing other people bc I didn’t want him to feel played, an he said it didn’t matter to him. Since I live 30 minutes from campus he just spent the night. Yes, we hooked up and we slept in the same bed—twice except we didn’t go all the way the second time. Also had a couple head sesh’s/FaceTime/sexting. He’d call me boo & baby & send cute emojis. But 3 times he’d delete or block me and then reappear claiming his phone was messed up and you know I wouldn’t delete you boo... He graduated this term and deleted me again an I didn’t hear from him for a bit. I thought we’d had a little misunderstanding an never got to say bye so I sent a fairly long text saying I understand if he’s moving forward but was sorry I didn’t get to say bye an I enjoyed our times together an he’s the best. He sent back kind of a formalish but friendly reply thanking me for helping on his journey and being there an time together. That I was the best and he’d never forget another me that I know that. Sent back a 💞 an we didn’t talk since.

Fast forward 2 months later this girl adds me on tiktok. I accept an add her back. It’s when I start watching her videos that I discover she’s been dating this guy before last semester even started. One even showed her gushing over the texts he’d sent her like the same months we were hanging. I still wonder what made her add me to begin with but here’s the problem. Clearly I was a fling it’s fine, but I feel bad for her. Obviously he was playing both sides of it an that’s probably why he’d delete me. Should I tell her, especially since I no longer have the texts that clearly show him cheating. Or should I just let it go as him deleting me with no further contact shows he’s straightened up and being loyal now?

I’ve been on and off them for years, kind of at the point where I seemed to lose most of my interest. Dry responses that aren’t open ended will be ignored

Hello!

So there’s this guy who I’ve kind of been chatting with for about a week. He’s a friend of my friends older brother and the guy and I have known each other for a few months now. He’s done things such as call me feisty, ran back to a restaurant to get some leftovers I forgot when I didn’t want to get out of the car, complimented my outfits, noticed when my other friend and I accidentally wore matching boots, noticed when I was sitting alone and immediately came up to me and started talking to me, etc.. About a week ago, he asked if I wanted to hangout sometime so I gave him my Snapchat and we talked on there for a bit, but last time I texted him (he started the conversation), he responded with a single word for an answer. Then I sent him a video of a dog who has wormed its way between my legs (I work at a doggy daycare place) and he opened it but didn’t say anything in return. Before, I thought he liked me but now I’m not so sure if he does or if he’s just being nice. It’s important to know that he works night shifts and we were texting at night. Thoughts? Opinions?

Yes over finances and it was weird and annoying. Any little chance he got he would bring it up and say "well NOT EVERYONE IS AS LUCKY AS YOU" ... I literally got money after my grandparents died from their estate, the fuck

2 months ago, we went out to dinner and talked for 3 hrs on first meet up. We were in contact via Instagram messages. Then we talked on the phone to buy tickets & see the Spider-Man movie. The day before movie I asked if he could stop sending those IG video reels politely, it was a bit overboard. On day of movie, he said good morning and I replied with a wave emoji. He normally would continue the conversation via Instagram but doesn’t message again until he said he was waiting at the theater. I was not as bubbly as I was on first meet up , I was very quiet (not against him). He was annoying me during the movie, he’s the type to laugh and make noises when something exciting came on. He nudged me during the movie and asked if I was ok because I was quiet and I said yes. At the end I told him thanks, he said you’re welcome and he said drive safe. When I spoke with him on phone day before movie, he told me that he talked about me with his friends but after movie he sent a message just now saying that he wasn’t really feeling it from me and it’s not going to work for him. I was more upset that he beat me to rejecting him, I would have done it if he didn’t. Flash fwd to a month ago, he sends me a dm with an inside joke, I just left him on read again. He continues to follow me on social media but unmatched with me from the dating app we met through, I unfollowed him from IG.

What would you do?

I think I’m def more romantic HOWEVER, I do feel like not as much as I used to since I never got it reciprocated lol.

You know the saying the good ones are already taken? The good looking ones always are, does that mean I’m not one of the good ones? This post comes across as very defeatist but I’m just being blunt, I’ve been on and off the dating apps for years. I’ve become more and more inactive, I can’t tell if I’m uninterested or burnt out. Getting matches have never been the issue, it’s just working out. I’ve never been approached by the kind of guy I’d actually date, people tell me that guys look at me but they never do anything about it. The ones that do aren’t the types of guys you’d want, don’t want to overthink it either but I have a very low sex drive. I don’t socialize so the apps are the only way, I don’t want kids & think it’s time to come to terms with this. My mom said this a while ago, “if you choose to be single your whole life that was your choice”. That was a bit insensitive & ignorant

Since men have such negative opinions about both, would you rather be with if you had to pick:

gold digger: into you for money since she most likely doesn’t work, wants you to buy everything for her, usually attractive, life revolves around shopping and spending money, being girly, looking good

career woman: busy, ambitious, doesn’t have much time for you, likely makes just as much if not more than you, life revolves around her career, not family oriented but education/career comes first

Okay so when I say older, I’m saying potential matches up to 38. My filter before was 29-34, personally I feel like 40 is too old for me. I mean guys my age likely already have kids, expanding the range will only bring more fathers. A few people have implied that women go after older men because they’re more mature but that’s a generalization it just depends. I really doubt matching with older guys is going to just bring more luck, since I’ve been lacking it with the dating apps (using them on & off for several years).