Questions: Other

I have not really gotten off the ground running on just about everything in life. It is really hurting my self-esteem and has left me feeling ignored, irrelevant, bored, and feeling like I am losing my ever fucking mind.

I will provide a few examples:

One, I have been trying to sell my independent web services. I am a talented web developer. I acknowledge AI is making it easier to create web apps and websites, but not everyone has fully adopted it yet for these purposes. I had a few clients and created websites for them last year. I received mostly positive feedback, and I offered my services for a steal. I was supposed to work on one more website for another small business, and it has been over 6 months and I haven't heard a thing from them. That is now $1,500 I will not be getting. They are a landscaping supply company, so this time of year would be ideal. Meanwhile, I launched a website trying to gain clients. No calls, no web form submissions, nothing. I advertise, sometimes cold call, reach out to other recruiters and company owners... nothing. One of my clients from last year that I was told needed updates, they have yet to provide me with anything. Potential and existing clients are pulling back.

Then, I am spending a lot of my time now trying to advocate and raise awareness about our crumbling public safety infrastructure in my state, as it has become very problematic. I have spoken with news organizations, and they now either lie saying they will "get to it" or I am ignored and sidelined.

I feel like I am not taken seriously now, and that I have become irrelevant.

I don't know about all of you but sometimes ill catch myself randomly thinking back to moments of my life where i was confused by someone or something... and now i have this moment of 'of course!'

Anyone else ever do this?