Search Results: settling for someone

A young user asked how is an average looking guy supposed to attract a woman because, according to him, all women want to date extremely handsome guys. Well, I know that I don't want to date someone who I think is ugly, but I have dated a lady who others told me was "homely" and I thought she was cute. But I also knew that she was not attractive in any objective way. I guess when guys look at the same woman, we see different things.

When you found your last SO, did you hold out for the hottest companion you could attract? "I'm not settling for anything less than 8/10!" Or did you find yourself attracted to someone who was average in appearance but a great person in other ways.

How important is that 8/10 to you?

Is it selfish and unjustified to turn someone down because they werent attractive enough? Or is it a necessary requirement to be physically attracted to your romantic partner to a sufficient level? What if your potential partner is a 5-6/10? Is this good enough for you, or would you be settling? Some say looks will fade so it doesn't matter in the end, but others would like to keep their standards. What about you? Have you been on the giving or receiving ends of this judgement? Both? Comment below.

My story: I have only ever "dated" one girl and I reciprocated her feelings out of fear of making her sad. We never met in person but we sent eachother things via mail. Without realizing it, I was effectively leading her on to believe I liked her back even though I didn't really feel any genuine love. It got to the point where I asked her to be my girlfriend, but in the same day I told her the truth and why I hid it. She sent me a song, it was "Letters" by Seneca B. I felt so guilty afterwards because she was such a nice and sweet girl and didn't deserve that. I cried a lot. It's honestly taken me longer to recover than her since she's already over it. Part of me wants to believe I was justified, and part of me says I was in the wrong. She said she still wants to be friends since we had a good connection to eachother besides the failed relationship. And while I agreed for a while, I couldn't sustain it. I felt heavy guilt to the point where it was interfering with my studies. I sent her a long text a few days ago telling how I felt and why I was blocking her. I don't know what to think. I have mixed feelings. I guess I'm just inexperienced and I've learned my lesson. Looking to read other's opinions and experiences as feedback.