Search Results: eating out a girl

Reasons why he might not text you back in 5 seconds
1) He has a life
2) He just talked to you
3) He has job to keep
4) Someone else is texting him or he actually uses phone for calls
5) He is taking a Shit
6) He is wiping his ass from taking a Shit
7) He is driving
8) He is eating
9) He is walking the dog
10) (and this is important) he is shopping on my Etsy shop

Her responses

1) He doesn't love me anymore
2) I am not important to him
3) How dare he talk to his mother instead of me
4) He better be at the Emergency Room
5) Is our relationship in trouble
6) Who is the other Bitch?
7) He has never taken longer than 5 seconds before
8) I never want to see him again
9) He better be buying me something then
10) No text , no nudes buddy

I just know he is breaking up with me (bonus)

I was known as the chug king the chug king in middle school and high school in middle school it was a 2 letter bottle of sprite (baseball team) vs a 2, letter bottle of coke the girls where like “that’s unfair they have josh on there there team obviously the guy’s team won the girls even asked i would be DQed because of my chugging ability fortunately I wasn’t I chugged a 2LT bottle of sprite with in 30 second, I have also stuffed a Big Mac mouth for 50$ so I’m now labeled as the eating and chugging machine so everyone I meat because I’ve been given an ability to chuck or big bite anything that’s in front of me for money I don’t do I it other wise I enjoy me food when I’m not getting paid or trying to show off