Search Results: how to close the deal

So I’ve been texting/video calling this guy for 6 months during lockdown. We’ve managed to see each other a few times after. We’ve kissed and made out one time.

Although we never really defined what we are, I think we’re kinda friends with benefits even though when we interact he doesn’t really treat me like a friends with benefits, he’s super caring and respectful and actually tells me stuff about his life. Plus doesn’t press me into sex at all.

He says he really loves my company and is impassioned by me; he also said once he couldn’t help but fall for me. But he’s very inconsistent and sometimes we can go from texting everyday to a week without texting and he leads a super busy life and all.

So here’s the deal,
It was my birthday at some point during lockdown and I told him a couple of days before and he said he would love to give me a hug and wished me a good day. But when the real day came he saw my stories about my birthday and said nothing!! 4 days later he texted me acknowledging my birthday by asking if I had a good day and saying he hadn’t been well cause someone he used to know died…but still…

His birthday is coming soon but we haven’t texted in a week. We’re suppose to hang out but he’s very busy. So I’m wondering whether I should text him happy birthday or reply to one of his stories and say “Is it your birthday? Hope you had a nice day x” OR whether I shouldn’t text anything at all? Oh and actually he never mentioned his birthday to me at any given point so I’m not so sure I should and I feel if I do I’m chasing after him a little.

Thing with this guy is I don’t want to get used to me always being there for him cause I won’t be! Sometimes I have a feeling he takes me for granted also I’ve added him to my close friends list on insta but for privacy motives.

And maybe if I don’t wish him happy birthday it might serve as a wake up call for him

So I've always been a rather reserved person, and never really hugged anyone till I met my girlfriend. I am 19, she is 22.

However, my girlfriend is just SO affectionate with people she is close to... I'm fine with it, but it's all new to me. I'm not used to seeing it, since I didn't hang out with friends too much growing up. To be fair, she's only this way with other girls, not guys, but I know she's bisexual, while I'm lesbian...

But anyways, she HUGS people a lot, first of all... pretty tightly, too. Face squeezed up against their face, and all. She also PECKS them on the cheek. Not all of them, but about half of them. She also likes to SIT CLOSE to them, thighs and shoulders touching and all. She even does this while in SWIMSUITS and SHORT SHORTS and TANK TOPS... so a lot of bare skin contact, heh... she says "it's just skin, no big deal at all silly!"

I don't know if I'm just weird, but doing what she does so often, so frequently, with so many friends and family members... would just give me sensory overload.

I know that none of her friends or family members are lesbian or bisexual though. So it's safe, but I can't help but wonder if this is normal...

Whenever I bring this up to my girlfriend, she just laughs and says, "How silly! I'm just really, REALLY affectionate! And besides, remember this, queen... you're the only one I French kiss and have sex with everyday, so no need to be jealous, ya goofball!"

So that makes me feel better, haha.

If it matters, my girlfriend is Black, 22 years old, 5'11, muscular, curvy... when it comes to hugging shorter people she has to sort of pick them up, or else her boobs will literally be in their face, lol. It's kind of humorous. 😂😂😂