Search Results: thoughts of suicide

Specifically, if you thought that they might be suicidal which turned out to be false when they were an underachiever. But in the years since then they became an overachiever but then killed themselves and said it was because you weren't willing to risk losing the underachieving version of your child so now you lose the overachieving one.

I'm going to JUMP 4 JOY when my mom dies. When I was 16 my parents committed me to a psychiatric hospital because my parents thought I was a danger to myself because I had mild depression and she thought a cat scratch wound was self inflicted. Because my parents was too paranoid about teen suicide because back in 1993 my sister offed herself when she was 14 so they had me committed to a mental hospital without an evaluation. It took 5 days for the lab results to come back and then I was released. But not a week has passed since then that I haven't contemplated suicide or inflicted self harm. Their decision to commit me has permanently ruined my quality of life. But 2 months ago my mom was diagnosed with terminal cancer and at this point she only has 4 months to live. To make matters worse, she had the nerve to call me and ask me to visit her; I told her to fuck off and rot. I can't wait till she's gone and dead. Maybe then I can lay half those bad memories to rest.

My parents sanctioned me because they thought I was suicidal (the psych evaluation showed that I wasn't). But since I got out I can't go a week without contemplating suicide or a month without resorting to some form of self harm to alieve the mental pain. I have flashbacks constantly and the pain is unbearable. The worst part of it is that my parents have the nerve to lie and say that it broke their hearts to do it. If it did, then they shouldn't have done it in the first place; it's that simple. I hope that they die a slow and painful death. What many have said is that even killing myself wouldn't be enough to make them regret it. However, when I was sanctioned I was an underachiving D student but since then (when I was 16) I pulled my grades up to get into a reputable university. I graduated the University with high honors in a STEM field and I was recently accepted into a Tier 1 PhD program in that field, but now the desire to end my life now to make a point is stronger than ever because they would be forced to face the fact that because they weren't willing to risk the life of the underachieving version of their son they now lost the overachieving version. And I think that if other parents who fear that their teens may be suicidal hear about this it will fill their hearts with fear and they will think twice before committing their son or daughter. Does anyone else feel this way?

G@G, before you remove this question and direct me to the suicide hotline, know that I said that I WANT to do these things, NOT that I plan on actually DOING them, so don't waste your time.