So i was answering a question recently which asked people whether or not they would date a feminist. Quite a few people voted and continue to vote, and so far, about 2/3rds of men voting said no, while a third said they would. Personally, i stood with the one-third of men that would date a feminist and I thought I'd list my reasons as to why. I think a lot of guys have a bit of knee-jerk reaction to the word feminism, which is understandable given some of the erroneous facts and laws that have been pushed in the name of feminism and gender equality over the years....however I do find that if you take a closer look at the average woman who does label herself as a feminist, you'll find that there is nothing any more or less dangerous about her than any other woman who chooses not to call themselves feminist. I've always had a more nuanced view to things, and feminism has been no exception. Anyways, here are my top five reasons as to why dating a real feminist can actually be a great thing:
Reason 1: Real Feminists Are Independent
Probably one of the best reasons why one would date a feminist (a real one) in my view is that they tend to be fairly independent. They enjoy to pay their own way, and not rely on anyone to support their lifestyle. Their independence means that they often aren't as clingy as a typical girl, as they are often accustomed to relying on themselves anyways. In my view, what makes a real feminist sexy is the fact that when one does choose you as her boyfriend, she does so because she wants you in her life, not because she needs you. This is probably the most advantageous position to be in, as its less likely that she'll want to take your stuff if she already has stuff of her own.
Reason 2: Real Feminists Are Empathetic
I've noticed that a lot of people who i'd consider to be real feminists are probably amongst the most empathetic people you'll meet. A large part of their empathy comes from the fact that they tend to be more in touch with societal inequalities that affect other people, which naturally occurs while they are on their own journey to discover the difficulties women face in today's society. Now, these supposed inequalities that exist for women in the western world may be up for some debate, as i often do, but it doesn't take away from the fact that real feminists have a lot of compassion for people who are struggling...almost to a fault.
Reason 3: Real Feminists Are Often Intellectually Stimulating
The natural result of a woman paving her own way in life is that she ends up being quite well learned, often studying very advanced subjects in order to acquire a degree. Beyond that, they often can be very curious and inquisitive, which propels them to seek out and learn things on their own outside of the classroom, picking up knowledge and skills that they could even pass on to you if you pick their brains hard enough. These are people you could hold a conversation with, talking about things that actually matter, or have some practical use or purpose. Those are the kind of women that can keep you interested for quite a long time.
Reason 4: Real Feminists Actually Do Like Men
Contrary to popular belief, real feminists actually do like the opposite sex...so much so that they'll bring the issues they suffer through to public attention. They are often the ones who challenge the perception that only a woman should have custody of the children after a divorce, the legitimacy of alimony in the developed world and the rampant rise of male suicide rates. Real feminists are generally concerned with inequality suffered on both sides, and as stated in reason two, they can be quite empathetic towards men on those issues. They have sexual attraction towards men just like any other woman, and I imagine they are just as fun to be with sexually as any other woman.
Reason 5: Real Feminists Will Make You A Better Man
My final and probably most controversial reason is this: A real feminist will make you into a better man. What do I mean by this? I mean that this woman, because she is often so driven herself, will often push/encourage you, directly or not, to expect more out of life. A good woman in general will act as a mirror to the man she is with, and show you amazing parts of yourself that you never thought could possibly exist. A real feminist will always keep you thinking, preventing your brain from atrophying on endless supplies of porn and video games (not that I'm particularly against these things). These women can often be a source of inspiration in your own life, and can be great partners to have at your side when you need a pick me up or words of encouragement.
So there you have it. Five reasons why I think a dating a feminist would actually be a good thing. Now I may not identify as a feminist myself, since I don't really agree with them on certain core issues when it comes to the problems they face in the western world (nor do i really want to have to run constant interference for the actions of feminazis), I don't really see the need to have a fearful knee-jerk reaction towards dating them. I mean we aren't even talking marriage here, although i do believe the reasons do still carry forward into marriage. I personally don't have a problem with dating a real feminist, and i would encourage other men to challenge themselves a little, utilizing a bit of introspection in order to figure out why you may or may not have an issue with this. Also, I'm fully aware that a certain segment of the male population on here won't get too far through this myTake before preparing some hateful comment for me or others, but that's quite alright. I've been interacting with a lot of these same people for many years now on GaG, and so I've already heard it all. This group has always hated me, and as always, I welcome their hatred.
Written in honour of a real feminist @BarbaraP