Search Results: boyfriend keeps lying

So my boyfriend was texting my best friend a lot and he took a while to respond to me. I felt jealous in a way because it’s how I get due to the way I was treated before. So I told my best friend but she told him and he tried to ask me what was wrong but I thought it was stupid so I tried to get him to avoid it. So what HE did was go to my best friend and say mean things about me such as how I was toxic, I didn’t care about how he felt, how he’d break up with me if I didn’t trust him by the end of the year because he’s been trying to gain my trust for almost a year (keep in mind he told me that he’d never leave me so when I found out he said this I was devastated and angry), and that I was an unsolved person. I have told him that if he ever has a problem with me to come and talk to me because it’s part of communication, but no he went to my best friend, said a bunch of stuff about me, and then lied to my face when I asked him something at school. So I felt really angry and ended up scheming behind his back. This is what “I” did: so I was really angry and I was ready to confront him this coming up Monday and give him an ultimatum but I was getting really impatient so I had my best friend send a lot of stuff to him and they ended up arguing. I was on her account the whole time so I knew what was happening but at the same time when he was texting MY account I was acting clueless. I was really mad and I believe that me scheming behind his back is how I retaliated to him lying to my face, saying things behind my back, and refusing to listen to what I’m trying to say. Well now that we talked about some of the things he said I realized that when I tell him about me scheming behind his back on Monday then he might hate me. I don’t know what to do and I don’t know who’s right or wrong (for all I know we could both be in the wrong). I also just want to know who did more hurtful things. My best friend said it’s 50/50 bc we both did wrong. Can someone please help? And explain?

We got into a bad argument a couple months ago after a weird period of us being really distant from each other, and he admitted to being so frustrated he thought about hitting up other girls, but never did. And since then he's been talking to this girl he knows 24/7. I'm not exaggerating when I say there is a notification that she messaged him every time I get a glimpse of his phone. But whenever I told him about how uncomfortable it made me he told me I was being selfish and paranoid and that she needed help because she's struggling with all these different problems and so on, and would continue texting her constantly. I had kept noticing the past two months or so, whenever he'd hand me his phone for whatever reason he'd always delete their DMs before handing it to me. And last night I had finally had enough of that and called him out. I was more mad that he thought I was actually stupid enough not to notice him do that so often then I was about him talking to her. And he kept listing excuse after excuse and kept saying he wasn't lying since they weren't doing anything and I have no reason to be mad and blah blah blah. But he is STILL talking to this chick non stop. And it really bothers me that he uses him knowing her from school (for less of a time than I knew him) as an excuse and will completely ignore my discomfort. I understand he's gonna have female friends and talk to them, I have male friends. But I don't understand why I'm in the wrong for being uncomfortable with him repeatedly crossing the boundaries of my comfort. He claims I'm violating his free will but I'm not asking him to drop communication entirely. I just want him to be mindful of how I feel and take that into consideration before going out of his way to start a conversation every day.