Is this guy living in denial, insecurities or what?

[Anonymous]

Long story short: His first girlfriend left him, he came back home because he could not digest the break up because he could not let go the next year he started chasing his ex again even if she had a boyfriend. He planned trips with her (she went but brought a friend with her). Then he met me in 2020, It was attraction at first sight. When I asked him his relationship status, he said that he is in a relationship but its not full-on. We kept talking but soon I realised that he isn't even in a relationship, he is in denial. I was helping him to move on but he won't, too stubborn. He spoke about me with his friends and his ex but won't get close to me. Recently, a situation cropped up with his parents (he did not tell them that his ex girlfriend left him) and he put me down and was valuing her. It went too far so i spoke to his parents and asked them to help him move on. Now, he is pushing me away because I told his parents the truth after he has been lying to them for 4 years.
What is this immaturity? Denial? psychological issues? Insecurities?
I am supporting him because we are related and we like each other.

Has anyone been through something similar?

[Aassem]

You had no right to tell his parents tho..
And I don't see that he's immature or insecure or whatever, and he didn't lie to you, he told you the truth from the beginning, what he said should have given you the idea that he's involved with someone which he is, at least mentally, doesn't matter it's one sided or not, he's not completely available emotionally, and it's his right to not move on if he doesn't want to, it's his choice nobody should push him to do otherwise.. He possibly knows what he's doing and you shouldn't drag yourself with him, you deserve better than this none sense, so why put yourself through such a complicated relationship? The bottom line is that you shouldn't judge him for his choices, you shouldn't interfere and you deserve a better relationship with someone who appreciates you fully, or maybe you don't, in this case you need to reassess your life and make changes to be.

[Asker]

Well because of his stupidity, his father shouted at me so I opened my mouth and spoke up. I did not interfere for no reason. Now you will say that it's his right to say bullshit about me and get me insulted? If I want I can send his father to court for abuse !
You are probably right I deserve better.

[Aassem]

I will not say that, his in the wrong here and it's all because he doesn't appreciate you.. The only thing that you did wrong is that you took it upon yourself to fix him, it's not your responsibility to fix his sad life.. You do deserve better, and you won't get any less than what you deserve in the next relationship (which is an attractive, decent and mentally competent man who truly appreciates you) because you learned a goo lesson now with this one, right?

[Asker]

Yes I want to heal him, I have been try to do so since last year, I did what I could, i initiated the change now up to him to carry forward and change his life for the better.
Right, I deserve someone who appreciates me. Thanks

[Aassem]

You are welcome <3

[kamalravi25]

Immaturity.
He has to understand the fact that he is just infactuated towards his ex.
You cannot change him and neither can his parents.

[Asker]

I told him his ex does not love him anymore. He should move on. The girl sleep and flirt with other guys, she doesn't have a single picture of him on her social media, they live miles away from each other in 2 different countries, still he cannot walk away. He isn't mature enough to tell his parents the truth, I did that for him now up to him to move on at his own pace.

[kamalravi25]

Its simple if u can take it then stay with him else leave him to his own fate.