Search Results: becoming less shy

I've been on a lot of dates, but I've never been the one to ask a guy out. I'm more of a shy person so I've honestly never even tried and I'm terrified of it. I prefer the process of getting to know someone and becoming friends with a guy first.
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But I pushed myself and I've approached a few guys before to make conversation and some of them got the idea that I liked them but their attraction would wear off because they didn't ask me out. I felt that maybe it was because they generally weren't interested or just sensed that I wasn't really being myself and wasn't putting myself in a position to be pursued. Sometimes, guys digged that but then they only wanted sex from me, so then I reject them because friends with benefits is not my thing.

You know what I find odd? Men keep saying that they love the chase, yet sometimes they don't pursue and are expecting a woman to make the first move. I just think that's kind of cringe because I prefer to be the one who is pursued and 99% of the girls I know do too. I've noticed lots of guys might be enticed by this kind of girl at first, but then they move on to someone else who they want to pursue. *Basically they think the girl who approaches first just wants to suck their dick.* What's your opinion on the chase?

i like this boy i was secretly digging years back in high school. We never talked ever and this continued all the way until our graduation ( were i never seen him again). in high school he was quiet& a little chubby but not ugly and i wasn’t the best looking at the time& because of it i was always shy (especially to tell someone i liked them) however, not the case now lol (thank god for the glow up).. I've always tried to search him up on social medias after graduating in hopes of breaking the ice but never found his profile and gave up , then his account magically popped up as a friend suggestion and i didn't hesitate to send a request.. he was always cute but he almost seems like a different person. He’s in shape extremely good looking &now in the army... so when i got courage to send a request he accepted it, I waited to see if he would text me at all &he didn't, so i did.. i originally said “ hey ( his name), how have you been☺️” and thing is at times i seen he was online but didn't open my message... i talked it over with fam/friends and theyre like he might be thinking “ why text him now.. why didn’t I talk to him then , or am i only texting him because he looks better “ etc.. which is not the case, I mean don’t get me wrong his glow up has me literally ogling over him but that’s not only it. after like a day & a half of waiting to see if he’d text back ( in which he was sort of on and offline), I decided to text“ I’m sorry if it seems random to text you but I sort of had an interest in you in hs” and he stilldidn’t read it, I noticed his activity times were becoming less so I sort of snooped &found out that he was deployed like the day before I sent the first text message…However the same pattern of things like active 15 hrs ago was still happening ( slow but still sort of active) so like a week later he reads the message& doesn’t reply.. I know this sounds crazy because I know he's in combat, but I didn’t know if he couldn’t text back or if he was ignoring it.