Search Results: falling in love with a friend

Okay so, I'm a white guy and I ran into an old friend from my school days. We were never that close, but I partied with him sometimes, so he invited me to his house for some drinks and to meet his wife. I reluctantly went, but whatever. For context, he's a white guy too and she's from the Philippines. So from the moment that I met her I was shocked by how beautiful she is. She's also really kind, smart and an excellent wife and mother.
My friend on the other hand is an asshole. He criticizes her constantly and for no good reason. Once we started drinking I lost my composure and I definitely told her how beautiful she is and what an amazing wife she is. I felt kind of bad for the feelings I was developing for her so I just decided to stay away from them. Jump ahead a few months later and that guy is texting me again. He wants to have drinks and this time he picks me up, drives me to their house and basically forces me to spend the night. I'm reluctant about it, but secretly excited to see her again.
So there I am drinking with him, listening to him critisizing her like usual, but this time I start interrupting him, sticking up for her and telling her how incredible she is right in front of him.
I could tell it irritated him but I don't care. In private he tells me how stupid she is, and in private she tells me what an asshole he is.
I'm stuck in the middle, he's a big scary guy and I'm falling in love with her.
How do I handle this situation?

So 4 years shrunk down into a few lines.

I was friend with this girl for 4 years. She was the greatest friend I've ever had and she said I was the greatest one she's had. I made a promise to always love her and stay by her side no matter what. And she promised to never abandon me. (I've got abandonment issues.)
Well... I ended up falling in love with her. I confessed and tried to get her to go out with me for 2 years in the 4 years we were talking. She rejected me every time. In the past, I didn't mind her dating other people, because I wanted her to be happy and I supported it. And every time they would breakup with her, I was there to pick her back up. But just earlier this year, she found someone else to date and I couldn't take it anymore. We got into a fight, my insecurities came out and I said messed up stuff to her.
"You never really cared about me. I was just someone for you to talk to because nobody else was there." Stuff like that. So she told me I broke her heart and it would be best to not talk to each other anymore. So she chose this guy she knew for a few months over me, who she knew for 4 years and called me the greatest friend she ever had.
It's been almost a year since we talked. I miss her more than anything. If you were in her position and I reached out to be friends again, would you say yes or ignore me?