How long does it take to move on and forget someone?

[Anonymous]

I met this guy and we both started to develop feelings for each other, he was the one who developed it first and he started treating me in such a way that I fell head over heels in love with him.. But later, when he realized I've started to feel so strongly for him, he withdrew himself and said that he can't get into a relationship with me as he has many personal life problems, he said that it's better to remain friends, but maybe in future we can get into a relationship.. It's been two years and I just kept waiting for him, only to know that he has no feelings for me now, he just had them in the beginning and that to very mild feelings, it was just attraction.. Earlier we used to talk like almost two times or once in a week and now, he texts me after 10 days or two weeks and whenever I text him, he kinda procrastinates that let's talk tomorrow.. I feel as if our friendship is also falling apart all of a sudden.. What should I do, how to move on?

[HollyK21]

First and foremost, you have to separate yourself from him completely rather than be readily available. No more talking every few weeks/days/etc — go full cold Turkey. Give him a chance to really miss your presence in his life and to appreciate it because I don’t get the impression that he does. Second, you have to let go of “wanting the reward”. By this I mean, when we invest a lot of time and emotions into a person, we want it to pay off, sometimes it doesn’t and we have to be willing to accept that. On top of that you probably have fantasized about a relationship, the future, or whatever else. All of this combined just keeps you stagnant, waiting and hopeful. You have to release these things. Everything you wanted and hoped for with him, let it go and accept what’s actually happening. Lastly, let time do it’s thing. You didn’t fall for him overnight so you won’t get over him overnight as well. But once you remove yourself from that situation and allow yourself to grow and heal, eventually you will come to a place where you will be completely over him. But you’ve gotta start somewhere..