Search Results: can a guy ever change

So like I’m a guy and my impresion was “who gives a f*ck, you’re no longer with him anymore”.

I just don’t understand why women can’t just let go and forget about the past.

There’s nothing you can do to change it.

In life you should only move forwards and never look backwards.

Nevermind that one of her other exes cheated on her THREE TIMES and she kept coming back to the dude.

So I’m starting to reconsider whether or not she’s actually worth dating.

This is a girl who doesn’t quite seem mentally sound or stable. It’s common sense not to return to somebody if they’ve already broken your trust.

Because as nice as she is, this girl brings out a hell of unneccessary drama in my opinion.

And I genuinely don’t think I’m willing or capable to deal with any of it.

But then again, perhaps more women are like this than I previously thought.

Either way I can’t understand why she is still emotionally tied to people in her past, because I’ve since forgotten about everyone in my hometown ever since I went off to college.

So as it currently stands my relationship with her has just been “scratching along the surface” if you will.

We’ve been meeting regularly a couple of times a week but so far as relationship status goes its been exclusive but unofficial.

So as strange as it is, my impression of her has changed in the past 24 hours.

Before I thought she was just this friendly outgoing girl who gets along nicely with everybody, but now I’m realizing she could turn out to be a real piece of work I don’t want to get involved with. We have a lot in common and share the same interests, and I thought our personality differences compliment eachother nicely, but now I’m questioning whether or not this could ever possibly work

Either way I’ve decided to give things some more time and let it play out.

I might have to deal with her sometimes when I don’t want to, but I guess that’s the cost of a relationship.

I know women can easily change their minds on things depending on their emotions.

However once a woman sees an interested guy as nothing more then “a friend” it’s almost always final. Dead set. Game over. Do not pass GO and collect $200.

It’s just one thing woman are resolute once they have come to that mental decision.

I consider myself a high functioning adult these days; I was a professional "Composer/Recording Artist" for a number of years after gaining a PhD in Music Composition from Birmingham Conservatoire. However the money was sporadic at best so I changed careers and became a Chef, quickly rising through both the ranks and up the quality spectrum over 10 years to eventually become a Sous Chef at a 2* Michelin Establishment in London. However due to relationship responsibilities picking up (my fiance is a doctor and we both work 16hr days). Which would make having Kids... tricky to say the least. So I changed career again so I could maybe work from home. So now I am training to be an Ethical Hacker (Cyber Security Engineer). Anyway, my point is, most out people out there whom I have worked with, have always considered me very capable/dependable. So when they eventually find out that I come from a highly abusive background, they get taken aback... and some have even accused me of outright lying about it...( I can only assume that this is because "in their mind" you can't come from that kind of background and be anything other than dysfunctional...) Unusually, it's also often Women who have accused me of lying about this... and I am really not sure why... Guys tend to take it at face value (or even give me "props for not letting it affect me"). To clarify, my mum was diagnosed with Cancer when I was about 3, and my father was away on business abroad a lot, so I was only ever with her (watching her slowly fall apart), she died when I was 6.. my dad remarried, who I can only describe as a sociopath, she emotionally/mentally and physically abused me, gaslighting at every opportunity to make me and my father think we were loosing the plot.. I spent a lot of time believing I was having "black outs" because I couldn't remember hurting myself in the way she said..(because it was her). To this day I struggle a lot with trusting women.. I have to force myself to not assume the worst