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We all know (or at least should know) that "white" or "white" women is/are the standard of beauty in society for some odd reason. I say white only because other features like a Roman nose, straight hair, colored eyes aren't exclusive to the usual western idea of beauty.

I can't tell how I look to others or if it's genuine, whether I'm universally attractive (attractive to a large group/various groups of people with different beauty standards) or just ugly.

Of course I've had the occasional people that don't find me attractive.

I've noticed hostility from girls that I've worked with. The same that I've noticed from family growing up. Girls that will lie, act funny, make smart comments or avoid me for no apparent reason.

Then there's guys that I hear say I'm pretty or compliment me but it seems like guys compliment even the most sub par women just to get sex.

I've worked with guys where I knew they found me attractive and tried to be friendly for one thing.

I've had a customer come into a store I worked at and called me pretty. At the same place my coworkers (all male) were super nice and would act weird in a good way or compliment me. One told me a supervisor from the other store that came to help was on the phone with a guy from his store and said "there's this cute black girl that works here"

I apparently don't look like Megan fox or madison beer. Nor do I look like Lauren London or Megan good.

I've never had guys ask me out on a genuine date to get to know me for me. Maybe it's just this generation. I worked at a call center & a few guys in my training class tried to hit on me or they'd just stare.

I've also heard negative comments from men and it was usually when I was dressed up going out and it'd be something like "she thinks she's a superstar" "she just wants attention " petty things like that.

The negative experiences are what sticks with me and makes me think maybe I'm not so pretty.