Search Results: he canceled the date

First, he got me pregnant and didn’t want to discuss about the topic. The first thing he asked was where to get the abortion. When he found out I might keep it became angry. He said really selfish and inconsiderate things to me like I will resent you if you let the kid born…I don’t want a beeping child…etc. Lucky for him that I got a miscarriage, and he was just so relieved from that he doesn’t care about my physical health. He then realized how big of jerk he was, apologized, and give him time to fix things.

Not long after, he randomly came to me and told me his friend paid flights/hotel to do some crazy adventure by himself for the weekend…an example, like purposely sleep near people with covid. We live together and he didn’t discuss with me at all. His friends didn’t just randomly did that…they asked him of he’s down and he just said yes excitedly. He purposely didn’t tell me on my birthday because he knew I would be upset. He decided to tell me today. I obviously got upset about it. I did tell him that everything adds up, and this would really add another damage to our relationship. How inconsiderate and selfish can you be for not even discussing this with me…and just do it. He understands and that it makes sense that I’m upset. But, He won’t back down and basically saying he will go. He value his friendship with his friend and cannot be disrespectful to this free trip. He does have the option to pay his friend back…but he rather go have fun and fix the relationship after. It’s very hard to say this but he rather me be upset, damaging the relationship, and go have his weekend. He also lied that his friends bought it without asking the dates. He actually told his friend which exact date.

Then he tried to play it cool and told me to just let this go and suck it up. And that this is only happening because of the pregnancy and miscarriage thing. On top of everything, he missed my dad’s birthday claiming he got the dates mixed up.

Hi everyone,

I [31/F] have met a really great guy [34/F] on Bumble. We have had a bunch of FaceTime pseudo-dates, but unfortunately we've been unable to have a date in a cafe or restaurant because of government enforced lockdowns. He has invited me over to his house, and I feel comfortable doing so after seeing him and his house on camera.

I have quite a complex medical history because I have lupus, which I have told him about. He was fine with it, and his biggest concern at the moment seems to be that I can't tolerate horror movies. I haven't yet told him I have a hand tremor, but it will be obvious once we meet. It is not degenerative - it is a condition called essential tremor. It significantly affects my fine motor skills, including eating.

Would it bother you if your date had a hand tremor?

Also, how would you recommend telling him? I may be getting surgery for it in the future, but all non-urgent surgery is currently cancelled because of COVID-19, so there's a chance I may not have a tremor in the future.

Thank you in advance!