Have you ever been Monkey Branched? Did Monkey Branchers new relationship last long?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Monkey Branching - The term for one person in a relationship cheating emotionally and then when they secure a place with the new person, they leave you to be with that new person.

What’s your experience with this and did it end successfully for your EX?

[dynamicyandere]

For one of my exes… I was her first boyfriend, she left me for another guy that she was meeting up with behind my back for months, thinking the grass would be greener on the other side.


The contrast was huge and she said that dating him felt like dating a ghost. He hardly put any effort in the relationship, was never there for her, and ended up leaving her for a different girl.


She came running back to me, begging me to take her back. Being a sucker for trusting people and giving second chances, I decided to get back with her.


But the fact that she left me in the first place, really ate away at the relationship and underlying tension wasn’t resolved.


She had a big problem admitting that what she did was wrong and coming clean about everything.


It’s like she felt like if we didn’t talk about problems, the problems would go away on their own. Sweeping things under the rug, and not addressing the elephant in the room.


The relationship eventually didn’t work. I broke things off with her during an argument. It was one of those moments where there were so many issues swept under the rug that they could no longer be ignored. But, she didn’t want to resolve those things with me.


After I broke up with her. I cut her out of my life completely. Later, she said that me breaking up with her gave her depression and she needed to go to therapy.


I don’t know if she said that to try to make me guilty or if it was legit.


But later, somehow, she painted me as a horrible person for breaking up with her.


But I suppose that’s the way she has chosen to cope. Otherwise, the alternative is taking responsibility for her actions. And, admitting that she wronged me, hating herself, and triggering her depression all over again.


I sorta feel bad for her in a way. But she also brought this upon herself by being a cheating narcissist that refuses to take responsibility for hurting others.

[dynamicyandere]

Oh yeah, for length of time. I was with her for 2.5 years. Her new relationship lasted about 2 months.

[dynamicyandere]

The healthy alternative for her would be to:

1. Take responsibility for her actions and apologize with sincerity.

2. Let go of the past. Accept that what’s done is done. Learn to forgive herself.

3. Focus on creating a better future for herself and her future relationships, using the lessons that life has given her.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I am sorry it has happened to you. I didn’t know about that. That’s a very painful experience I can tell and in my opinion the worst type of cheating… The one that hurts the most. I honestly feel sad you had to go through this.

And I am happy now you are in a healthy relationship with an amazing woman.

You deserve it…

Breaking off that long term relationship just to be with someone else for 2 months… And then come back begging to you… That’s just… immature.

But deep down, I wish that was the same for my ex and I wish I could see him come to me asking for forgiveness, but he’s enjoying his holidays with the new girlfriend and with my calculations they have been together for 6-7 months at least.

[dynamicyandere]

Thanks for your kind words. Your ex should have never done what he did to you. He should feel sorry for the way he hurt you and give you a real apology. He owes you that.

Though, I suppose that may only happen if he matures as a person.

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

I just saw your profile image. You are really beautiful. And a law professional at that. I just feel at loss as to why your boyfriend would leave you.

You are somebody who is clearly, with 100% surety, desirable to many many people. I just feel bad for the guy now.

Why is it that good girls get bad guys? Something is wrong here.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Thank you ☺️

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I felt good reading this. 💕

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

You fit in the rare category of beauty with brains. You are overflowing in both. And not everybody can truly be with people like you.

It takes a strong person to be with a person from this category. A clear minded, resilient and a firm person. Because people like you are desired by everyone, people want to be with you, everywhere. A kind of powerful mind is required there, in your partner.

From one aspect, yes, you got betrayed. But from this another perspective, which I see, is, at least you did not get married and then separated afterwards. That would be ugly to look at.

I think I went in the damage control mode lol.😅 Sorry about that.

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

If you were my girlfriend and soon to be wife, I would not even look at any other girl from a romantic angle. Ever.

You seem to have qualities other people lack. Time management, you know your potential, and well, for me at least, you being a working professional is the biggest point. Because the mind stays fresh. Instrad of just sitting st home and all. You are updated. Always.

I have not included your beauty in these qualities, because the above qualities can be acquired by anyone. But you beauty cannot be. It is unique.

See? Already so many reasons to make you desirable to anybody.

I really do see all these qualities in you and hence, tried to be as subtle as possible in telling you just how desirable you are. As concisely as possible from my end.🙂

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Thank you ☺️ But I am not as perfect as you think.

The girl you describe- that’s me when I met him and when we were together and I am trying to become that girl again.

After we got stuck in long distance, that was a huge pain for me. Because I loved him a lot and I was willing to risk everything just to see him one more time. I quit my career, to concentrate on going back to him. China had a zero-covid policy and I struggled with going back. Everyday I talked with new people and tried to find ways to go back, I stayed at home and worked online just so I would be able to stay in touch with my ex-bf, because I was scared If I jumped back to my life I would forget him and our love. So I made it my goal to make him my priority.

That was a mistake.

It made me unhappy, unfulfilled and he lost his attraction to me slowly, as he always thought I was the girl - that you just described.

Until someday I wasn’t that girl anymore, I was sad and depressed and just wanted to hug him.

He told me to go on with my life and he would go on with his life until China opened up again, but I was scared that would take a long time and maybe before than we’d already been distanced from each other.

Tbh, I wasted 3 years of my life, 1st year wasn’t totally my fault as it was pandemic for everyone, 2nd one was depression as I was unable to go back to the only person I wanted to be with in the world.

3rd year was me - grieving the loss of our relationship.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

When he broke up with me, he apologized me that he made me a weaker person and that he hoped, I’d find a way to become as strong as I always was. But that’s bot the main reason he broke up with me, distance… It was already 2.5 years and we hadn’t seen each other, his feelings faded, he promised me to come and see me if I was unable to see him and that’s my mistake, I waited and waited and I wasted my time waiting. Now I know you should never wait for a man, just like I risked everything and eventually managed to go back, he could do the same, maybe it was impossible for the first 2 years but at some point it became possible and he chose not to…

Had we been together, I don’t think I’d have to forget my goals, as I would try my best to be successful together, he also told me we’d already been married of not the pandemic and separation m. I never wanted to marry, it was just him I wanted to marry, but life had other plans for us.

So, I am not as perfect as I look like. I am building myself again, to be as confident as I used to be. This picture is taken from the trip that was the ending mark of my grieving of this failed relationship, so I look a bit like my old self here. The one I was before I got all this drama in my life.

That’s a good lesson though. When I met my ex I made 10 times more money than him, now he is very successful and left me for someone else. That’s a good lesson, to never put your goals behind because of love and always put loving yourself first.

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

If only he was more resilient like you were.

But yes, lesson learnt. The hard way for you. And I through your emotions in words. That is an important lesson indeed. I think, the most important of all.

I will remember it when in a relationship. Always.

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

Everybody is imperfect. But I deem you a perfect girl by ignoring your flaws. That is how I show my affection for you.

This is what I would say to a girl in relationship with me. But since no one is there, nothing is there lol!😂😭😅

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

You’re so sweet 💕

And yep, if you can remember that will be helpful. He, too, was a prince charming in the beginning and treated me like a Goddess, I would never imagine him hurting me, it was me, who was the bad girl in a relationship in the beginning, I was always scared not to hurt him as he was so good.

But the moment you put yourself second, the moment you put your goals under the rug, that’s when you’ll also lose the love.

Because usually you are the most loved, when you love yourself 😊

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

And thanks, your words put a smile on my face 😇

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

The moment you begin to lose your independent identity, is the moment you begin to fade away from the mind of the person who matters to you.

A very very important lesson indeed.

I think this applies to friends, family and at workplace too. Right?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

In every situation… It starts within yourself, by respecting your dreams and goals and never ever forgetting them, even if the Earth stops turning, even if you think you’ve found the most beautiful love in the world. The first person you should be loyal to is - yourself.

That’s how others learn to love you.

The time I was treated like Goddess by my ex-fiance, was also the time I was very selfish and always put my needs first. He also did the same, he was such an amazing boyfriend at that time, because that was me - loving myself.

[The_Shadow_Dweller]

I have no real relationship experience. But looking at others, I know for sure.

If you are 100. Lets say. Then always reserve at least 30 for yourself in case of any major emotional fluctuations like a breakup or anything. Because you need yourself the most in the need. No one can help you out.

Yes. Fake consolations can work on many people. But, I do not believe on smart oeople like you. You would just see theough the lie at a glance.

[oceanAndSeas]

Well well. Not in a romantic relationship. I never had one. But one of my friends betrayed my trust. I found out he had been backbiting about me. It was a hurtful experience as we had been friends for almost 6 years

[Calculated_Guess]

Yeah she swung to another guy, then after a while she grabbed my branch again and swung back. I had hurt feelings so I climbed out of the tree and I left. Then I met another woman and when my ex tried to text me I ignored her.

[Calculated_Guess]

The other woman that I met was also trying to monkey branch to me and that was a mess too, lol.

[SlothySlob]

Doesn't happen to me. I'm not socially active. I am the branch that is, let's be serious here, too low and always on the other side of the tree from the monkey.

[Anonymous]

Of course. If you can improve your situation in life, then why not do it? However, if you are happy with your relationship, there is no need for it.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

How did it end?

[Grond21]

Cheating of any kind never improves your situation in life, even though it can falsely feel like it in the beginning

[SaoirseS]

I’ve never heard this term before, but no, it’s never happened to me.

[Bklynbadboy12]

I've never heard of this and no I haven't