Do men ever feel bothered by an ex girlf being with a new partner even if he is?

[Anonymous]

[Yourfriend2021]

The best idea is to forget the ex, she's an ex for a reason.

[Asker]

Of course, but emotions are rarely that logical.

[Yourfriend2021]

Some people are crazy, that's why.

[Asker]

Not really, emotions are human, emotionless is mentally ill, as well as acting out to extremes on emotions.

[Yourfriend2021]

People have emotions, but if someone's emotions are illogical, what does it say about them?

[Asker]

That they’re completely normal as a human being. The defining factor is whether and how they choose to act on them.

[Yourfriend2021]

Ok but if I have an ex girlfriend I just completely forget about her.

[Asker]

That’s good. But sometimes people break up for reasons they don’t want to etc.

[btbc92]

Asker. The guy is correct. It's human to have a motion but like he said if your emotions are a logical with its reasoning then you're doing it out of illogical and irrational reasons. No people break up because they want to break up. They didn't break up they wouldn't break up. If they felt they have to break up they have a choice. To break up or not break up. It's a conscious decision. Everything in life is a conscious decision. You being a human being has nothing to do with choices that you choose to make for every human being and every person is not the same. And this is coming from somebody whose emotional herself. It is not a defining Factor how you choose to act on them. If you're making excuses for your actions then you will be held liable and accountable for the choices you make. If somebody decides to drive under the influence, do they not end up in jail regards to how a person feels? Yes they do. Because any illegal action you make have consequences. That is the lesson he is trying to teach you. Do not use your emotions as an excuse. Either you learn to control your emotions or your emotions control you.

[btbc92]

Imagine somebody made those excuses towards you. You will feel very bitter about it because you expect that person to treat you the same way you deserve to be treated but meanwhile you're not treating them the way that they desire to be treated. If you have to ask this question you don't sound emotionally healthy for relationship. You are asking two men feel bothered by an ex being with a new partner. You know why? Because you yourself cannot live without having anybody that you can have for convenience. This has nothing to do with having a stable relationship. Just have nothing to do with your ex. It just says where you're not mentally stable. And in that situation you need to get counseling not another relationship. You're just using that new partner for your own personal benefits. That's wrong. No matter how another person may feel the ex is better off without you, if this is how you treat them. If you're the one that's miserable just admit that you're miserable. Not use other people. That's wrong. The moment you play that game, Karma happens. You know what they say about Karma. What goes around, comes around. Do not play that game that's my fair warning. Because once he ended with somebody else then you going to be mad that he's with someone else and that he didn't bother pursuing you. Please stop for your sake.

[Asker]

@btbc92 sorry but I wouldn’t feel bitter. Maturity teaches you that sometimes life can and does get in the way (long distance for example). And I’m not bitter because I’m not under any false pretence that people are perfect, including myself. We’re all a work in progress but so long as we have that emotional intelligence and accountability to improve it’s worthwhile. Now there are limits to people’s behaviour, obviously some do have bigger issues and that would raise concerns, but to pretend life is anywhere near perfect all of the time is ridiculous to be quite honest.

[Asker]

See the irony there…it’s actually my emotions that are more in check on that - I don’t get bitter.

[btbc92]

Asker. No. If your emotions were in check you would have understood what the user had told you. I know exactly what it is. That's a false sense of security. The reality is this is your life. You have to live with that decision. Just like there are things that I have to live with my decisions, that's the same with everybody else. You say you don't feel better but yet you're asking about an ex. Like they use a headset you leave the X alone. They are an ex for a reason. If you did not like what he had to say that says a lot about where you're not being truthful and honest. Anybody would actually feel upset about it. It's not about people being perfect. But we have to strive to be perfect in the things of God. Not about limits to others Behavior. Has everything to do with what you choose to accept and not accept. You broke up for a reason. And you leave it there and you move on. Stop looking for the past and look towards the future if you're that much mature.

[btbc92]

No long-distance have nothing to do with that. If you can't handle it just tell the truth. I'm sorry I just feel like I got a laugh at this because it sounds like to me you both gave up on something that you both was not serious about. When you truly love a person and you're truly serious you don't make every effort to be with that person. What are you talkin about? I'm sorry but a lot of you make me laugh when it comes to this did it because like are you really that serious? You told them at Rudy's so much but you not being honest here. You talk about how life gets in the way, how does long-distance have anything to do with your choices? You chose to be involved. You got with somebody else and now you're looking for an ex to miss you? No offense asker but this something really off about your mentality. You are involved with another man. Have some dignity and some respect.

[iseekpinetrees]

Yes if they still have feelings for her.

[FilmGuy93]

Sometimes. I never cared though.

[rachel776]

always!

[dudeinohio]

nope