What is the best way to better improve my social skills when talking to a woman I'm interested in romantically?

[Anonymous]

I've always had issues being social with people after a certain amount of time. The best way to put it is initially, I come off as outgoing and extroverted; however, after you get to know me better, I'm more reserved and introverted, and that tends to lead to the other person becoming turned off by my lack of extensive social skills in the long run. What is the best way for me to improve on this?

[dynamicyandere]

My MBTI is INFJ, which is the most extroverted type among the introvert types.


Like you, I’m able to come off as super extroverted (when I need to be) and I’m comfortable being the center of attention (when I need to be, at an event or something). But, when I’m by myself or the situation doesn’t call for it, I revert back to my introverted self because that’s how I relax and recharge.


There are people that will vibe with you more when you’re being extroverted and there are people that will vibe with you more when you’re being introverted, and there will be people who vibe with both.


You’re a dynamic person. Own it. I may be an introvert at heart, but I’m a confident introvert and I know that my true friends stick around regardless of what “vert” I may be at the time.


You just need to get to know yourself better. Own who you are. Be confident in who you are, and the right people will stick around.


If people aren’t sticking around, don’t worry. Maybe you just need to work on yourself. Then, just do that. Strive to become the best version of YOU. On your journey, you’ll meet and find the best people along the way. 🙂

[Avicenna]

You have to practice to find out what works for you and what you’re comfortable with.

[auroraborealis_0213]

Just be honest. If you feel like someone is being turned off by you being reserved, just be honest about how you're feeling. For example: if you're just a naturally quiet person, or you're nervous to say the wrong thing, etc. You can kind of joke about it in a self deprecating way. At least, that's what I do, and I'm more attracted to/more likely to be friends with someone who has a self deprecating sense of humor or is just honest about themselves. It feels more genuine. Usually you ward off anyone who's not willing to be kind. But most often, they're nice about it and say they feel the same way sometimes. Its a win win. Plus its a way to get to know people more by opening up to them. Hopefully this helps. I know this is what I usually do. I don't have the best social skills either so don't worry, you're not alone in this.

[Iron_Man]

Practice on the site talking to women it will actually help you in person a lot better getting used to it

[Anonymous]

Put yourself in lots of social situations.