When was the last time you felt truly offended and what happened?

[CubaPirate]

[nolabels]

NOTICE - Very long story ahead:

The offense is noted some ways below.

The preamble is as follows:

In March of 2024, I suffered two cardiac arrests in conjunction with a "widow-maker" heart attack.
The psychological aftermath of my cardiac arrests has been horribly devastating to me, coupled with the diagnosis of incurable brain cancer in my wife just a few weeks later, which explained her indifference to my pleadings for her to call an ambulance for me as I laid dying a few weeks earlier.
Soon after my wife's diagnosis, a terrible argument ensued between myself and our adult son, due to my trauma, and also to our son's agony at the prospect of soon losing his mother.
That argument has led to our beloved son's ongoing estrangement from me.
My wife is still with us at this time, but she's fading faster as every week goes by.

I was SO, SO ANGRY that my rightful death had been taken away from me by what I saw as medical personnel eager to pin laurels upon themselves for having "saved" my life.
There aren't too terribly many SCARs in this world, so I was guessing that the docs and nurses were pretty proud of themselves.
To me, they acted as if they were, in those moments, anyway.

Upon the suggestion of an anonymous online commenter, last spring I joined a Face Book support group for "survivors" of cardiac arrest.

I was at first very reticent to express my feelings on that forum, but I was assured, after inquiries from me to the moderators as to the content of my postings, that any possible untoward commentary by me would be addressed, as needed, to me by them, but with them assuring me that the forum was "cafeteria-style".
Take what you want and leave the rest.
In other words, say whatever I want to say as long as it pertains to cardiac arrest.

My fears thus allayed, I began to open up about my feelings about the PTSD of twice undergoing resuscitation from cardiac arrest.
They were the most horrifying two eternities (1/2-hour Earth time) of my, then, 65 years on, or possibly off, this Earth.

After the cardiac arrests, I had been finding it necessary to begin causing physical pain to myself in order for me to be in control of pain that was greater than that of the severe trauma that I'd endured during the resuscitations, continuing unabated afterwards, so I began to talk about those phenomena in my writings.
Yes, knowingly, physically hurting myself gave me power over the psychological pain that I could not control.
Strange, but true.

Very soon (a couple of hours) after my comments regarding self-inflicted pain were posted by me, a person, who I've since come to find out is a bit of a semi-celebrity on the topic of cardiac arrest, attacked my writings as those of a crazed sex addict, and that my writings had no place in a forum for SCARs (Sudden Cardiac Arrest Resuscitatees).
I explained to him that my need for self-induced pain was in regard to me gaining some modicum of my own control over the other pain that I was feeling, the uncontrollable pain of the trauma that I was feeling due to the cardiac arrests that I'd experienced.

Within an hour of my rational reply to him, I'd found that I'd been ejected from the group, with absolutely no recourse available to me.
No recourse at all.
None.
The moderators blocked me from all communication with them within minutes of my beseeching them as individuals on FB for assistance.
Lovely, huh?

I was, and still am, terribly, horribly hurt by his actions and also by the complicit deliberate inaction on my behalf of the moderators of the group.
It seems that I hadn't joined a FB support group, after all.
I'd entered, for a very short time, Ted's cult.

I thank goodness that I got out of that dungeon, as appealing as it first seemed to me to be.
As many dens of iniquity may initially seem to be to be so inviting.
"Come on in, the first one is free", they say.
Yeah, the next hit will cost you your life, but they don't tell you that at the door, do they?

As time has gone on, I've discovered that this man seems to consider himself somewhat of an authority on the subject of cardiac arrest.
In his professional life, he's also a business-oriented "social psychologist", specializing in sexual addiction.
Yeah, you read that correctly.

He did suffer cardiac arrest, as did I, although some years before me, except that he remembers none of it, for days before, as well as days after the event, whereas I recall every grueling moment except for the few short minutes when my brain was devoid of consciousness-sustaining oxygen.
I was a mere few weeks out from my cardiac arrests, raw, hurting as badly as I believe a person can possibly hurt.
Him?
He'd had several years to (not) process his feelings and behaviors.

He'd gone on to write a commercially available pamphlet (money in his pocket), detailing his (personal and compiled reports from others, according to him, yet very clearly as a not-identified-in-the-pamphlet "psychologist") view of the ramifications of the trauma of persons who've suffered cardiac arrest, with him recalling the need over and over again as to the need to offer care and patience to those who've experienced cardiac arrest.
He, of course, does not proclaim his credentials as a psychologist anywhere in his pamphlet.
I would personally not grade his level of proficiency in the field as anywhere near adequate, much less helpful.
I'm also quite sure that his publisher's legal team advised him against mentioning his "credentials" as pertains to the pamphlet.
In my opinion, the lawyers should have insisted on him citing his "credentials", so as to avoid his bamboozling of the buying public.
(The pamphlet can be found, free of charge, as I did, with a bare minimum of internet savvy.)

Though I wholly agree with the 14 or so chapter titles in his pamphlet (chapter headings that I'd already formulated in my own thinking about the events, long before I came across his balderdash pamphlet), my analysis of most of the characteristics of SCARs is in very stark comparison to his analyses.
Very stark and often completely opposing comparisons.

[nolabels]

(continued) -

I'm not a psychologist, yet I experienced every possible moment of those horrific events.
He doesn't even remember it happening to him, yet he claims wisdom about, and knowledge of, events that are foreign to his experience.
He relies solely on his formal "training" in his analysis of the traumatic events.

I have an uncle who also has twice gone into cardiac arrest with no memories for a few days before or after his cardiac arrest events.
My uncle tells me that because of him not remembering the events, that psychologically, he's just fine, and I believe him.
Granted, my uncle may have strengths that I do not myself possess.

I've heard this Ted guy speak in an interview on YouTube where he very proudly mentions the psychologist "alphabet soup" that follows his name, as he also does just about everywhere else that he exists online.
Just not as pertaining to his commercial pamphlet.
I find that omission to be quite telling in itself.
When he speaks on YT of his specializing in sexual addiction, he guffaws and giggles as if he's a pubescent schoolboy that got caught jerking off during sex-ed class.
So, who here is the sex-obsessed individual, he or I?

Not that my posts were about sex in the first place, but just what is wrong with sex?
None of us would be here without it!

I believe that, like me, but in a way much different than I, the man is severely mentally ill and should be regarded with patience and care.

Very unlike that which he afforded me.

Yes, I am horribly offended by him, and, more than a year after being ejected out of the FB group, I'm still terribly hurt.
I consider myself lucky to have only been in the realm of his unhealthy influence for a week or so, rather than being unwittingly subjected to a lifetime of his sickness.

I've forgiven him in my heart.
He's sick.
I can't blame someone for their illness.

(Continued further)

[nolabels]

(More continuation)

I do still want a public apology from him for his horrendous behavior.
As for restoration to his cult?
No, thanks. I have much better places in which to invest myself, my time, and my efforts at healing.

I pray for Ted, as I do for myself and others.
He's a very sick man, in my opinion.
I'm very sick, too, but not in the way that I've been accused of by him.

I relate these events not as a "Look at what this guy did to me" expose', but as a caution to those few people who've experienced cardiac arrest and who may happen to come across him or his pamphlet.
I won't name the title of the pamphlet verbatim, but should they run across it, it'll be obvious to anyone who reads this post who is in search of help for themselves or their loved ones.

(More continuation)

[nolabels]

(Yep, more)

To any other hurting SCARs out there, for more than a year I had totally given up any hope of help.
Complete, utter hopelessness.
Unliving myself was out of the question for me, but I tried darned hard to do the same with 100 proof whiskey. That wasn't working out so well, either.
So, yet another hospital stay for chest pain came about for me a couple of months ago. Chest pain unrelated to the whiskey, as it turned out.
Zofran was the culprit.
I've had severe nausea upon waking every day since my cardiac arrests.
Zofran upon waking was prescribed for me.
It helped.
It helped the nausea, that is.

(Cont.)

[nolabels]

(Final installment, I hope)

The Zofran, it turned out, was causing the dozens of times per day, scary as can be, chest pains.
The big-hospital-affiliated doctors couldn't figure that out.
I lately returned to a trusted PCP that I hadn't seen for other reasons for a couple years.
I told him of EKG anomalies that were being ignored by the big-hospital docs.
Good old Doc ***** said that I should absolutely not be on Zofran with my EKGs showing those anomalies.
I totally quit Zofran a few weeks ago.
I've had but a very few mild episodes of chest pain ever since, and they're extremely likely due to anxiety.
So, I live with daily nausea for 4 to 5 hours every time I wake up now.
It's better than the fear of another heart attack a dozen times or more a day.

For a little while before the hospital stay, I'd been experiencing moments of sheer selfless love from unexpected sources.

When I entered the hospital this last time, that LOVE, which had previously seemed to me to be non-existent or worse, even malevolent, while in the hospital on previous episodes, was incessantly beating me over the head, seemingly yelling to me, as the resuscitation crew did so loudly, vocally, during my cardiac arrests, "WAKE UP, BOB, WAKE UP!!!", over and over until I finally responded with some unintelligible guttural "UNNNNHHH!!!" !!!

Yes, I responded to the LOVE being heaped upon me during the last hospital visit.

I WANT TO LIVE!!!
I WANT TO LOVE!!!

Since my last hospital stay, I've been extremely lucky to have God's love be extended to me over and over again by many people, with that love flowing back out from me towards others.
It's wondrous how God's power works.
I might not have believed it myself if such great love had not been bombarding me relentlessly over the last few months.
My troubles are still many, and they are huge.
God will see me through.

That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

Thanks for the question.

Cheers to you and may God bless everyone!

[CubaPirate]

Thanks for taking the time to give your in depth answer

[nolabels]

Thank you.👍

[TrimmedTip]

I’m a patient, and I was speaking about circumcision for medical reasons. But the doctor didn’t really listen—just brushed it off. That offended me.

[just_a_potato]

Was a camp counselor and one of my kids, 12 year old boy, would stick to my side as often as he could. In my head I adopted him lol. Well tell me why one day, he said "You know you're really pretty, even though you're black."

Quite literally was speechless like I've never had someone say that to my face before in real stankin life. He's lucky I didn't punt him across the soccer field. Safe to say I did NOT adopt him and I'm never working with kids again. 😭

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Quite a stunning case yep, I assume he didn't master irony, still possible to assume innocence from a 12yo. Anyway, it says something disturbing about his surroundings

[just_a_potato]

@Maybe_Maybe_not Yeah I was joking about the punting thing to make this answer a little less bleak haha. The kid was a sweetheart most of the time and I know that what he said had to be a product of his environment rather than what he thinks of me as a person lol. But I was offended for sure!

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Okay cool, that's more reassuring than what it initially sounded lol

[MemeSupreme]

a question i saw on here last night which is REALLY rare to happen. i think it got takened down. usually i ignore ragebait stuff online but it was a personal topic and i was not in the mood

but in like real life, it was a coworker doing something that makes it 10x harder for everyone else, which they were aware of. selfish people in the workplace just annoy me

[Nikki1989]

People troll truly offensive garbage online every day on here but I am numb to it now. Who cares what a few charmless, ill-educated people think and say?

[Kingofkings1992]

Being offended isn’t a sentiment that I experience. I feel frustration, I feel anger, mostly at things that I don’t agree with or things I deem unnecessary. But others words do not matter to me in the slightest. They just go in one ear and out the other.

[jshm2]

Rarely get offended by anything. But one time was accused of being "an American" and nearly gutted the guy.

[IYTRHG]

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[Phoenix98]

couldn't tell ya I stopped giving a shit years ago lol.

[Anonymous]

When i fought with my boyfriend and he called me bitch, i won’t forget that. I’ll bring it to the hell 😂

[Shiprex]

It takes a lot to offend me as I am up for anything and can grasp that there are AH out there who go out of their way to try to offend others.

[qwerty2469]

I have never been offe. ded in my life. I turned 44 2 days ago.

[dustybiker2]

My emergency restraining order was denied.

[Anonymous]

I usually get offended by my brother, I got used to it.