Search Results: should i ask a busy guy out

I’m going to try to sum this up as much as I can: I met this guy who’s a 2nd year law student on a dating site a couple months ago. He asked me on the first date, went well, I asked him for the second. Things were fine, he’d text me good morning almost every morning and check in throughout the day.

My issue stemmed from the fact that he hasn’t made an effort to see me in about a month but still texts me everyday (except one night a couple weeks ago, during a trip with his close friends, he was drunk and texted me that he wanted me there with him... turned into some dirty talk on both of our ends but we left it at that and didn’t bring up sex again)

Another issue is that when texting each other, I’d feel like I’m the one carrying the conversation. I believe relationships can’t be built on texts alone and honestly I’d rather FaceTime or call. I asked him to call me once, he said he would, but ended up not doing so.

After the second date, I felt like he was kinda pulling away. We’re both going into finals (I’m finishing my bachelor’s). My whole thing is, I get that law school is super busy. I know that especially around this time of the year, there’s not always time to hang out. I already pointed it out once when I felt he was pulling away and he apologized and explained what was going on with school.

I’m not sure why, but at some point last week, I had enough. He was days away from starting his finals and our conversations were turning into small talk sporadically. I just haven’t responded to him at all and it’s been days.

Part of me feels bad “ghosting” just because I know he’s been super stressed school and finals, and maybe I shouldn’t take this personally. The other part of me feels like he’s really not interested (I’ve felt this way for a while, we’re also both still active on the dating site) so it’s better for me to just walk away instead of waiting for him to do so. What do you think I should do?

I’ve been seeing a med student for ~a month and a half. I completely understand that their schedule is busy- I’m also in school but not as intense as them. I asked a couple of weeks ago what they thought about us, just to get an idea of where he is.

He said that he hadn’t reflected on it much because he’s been busy with school. To clarify, I asked if he wanted to stop things or see where we end up, and he chose the latter. Essentially, I gave him an out but he didn’t take it.

He drunk texted me and brought up s*x for the first time a few days ago (he went to visit his friends in another state and they got hammered). I went along with it because honestly, I thought about it and kinda wanted it too.

Right after that, it’s like he fell off the face of the earth. The next day after (I guess drunkenly asking for booty call), we chatted as usual throughout the day. I then asked him to call me (nothing serious, he’s never called me before and I just like talking rather than texting). He said he would as soon as he finished up in the hospital. I didn’t hear back from him for a couple of days. (Side note, this isn’t the first time he’s kinda disappeared or slowed down communication for a day or two, I’ve brought this up before).

So I finally texted him to see what was going on. He got back to me quickly and he apologized and said that things were getting kinda crazy with school. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t know what to say. He texted the next day to see how my day was going. I’ve been going back and forth with whether or not to respond or even what to say.

Does it sound like he’s legitimately busy and sorry? Or doing damage control just to waste my time? If I should respond, what should I say?

I appreciate all the help, I’m super new to dating.

Also, in my old question, it seemed like most guys agreed he was busy and most girls said he’s wasting time which is interesting.

I was seeing this guy for about a month. We met on Hinge. We’re both med students in different schools in diff states (next to each other) so we have busy schedules. We have gone on a couple of dates (he initiated the first one, I initiated the second). He would initiate texting almost every morning to see what I had going on for the day/check in.

A day or two after date 2, it seemed like he was a little distant? He didn’t text me for two days so I asked what was up (he was helping a roommate move and went to see his parents). He went right back to texting me as usual. I did ask him a little while back what he thought about him and I. He said he’s been busy with school so he hasn’t taken time to think it out but he wanted to see where things go. Also, no mention of sex from his end at all, until:

Here’s where things get weird: one weekend, he sorta sent a booty call message to me (post exam celebration with his friends so he had a few drinks). I played along because honestly, I was kinda interested. The next morning, he seemed kinda distant. I told him to call me (I missed the sound of his voice) and he said he would after he finished a shift in the hospital. Haven’t heard from him since and it’s been a few days.

Is he ghosting me? Or should I reach out? He’s usually the one to reach out and will even double text if he hasn’t heard from me but nothing so far.

And if it he is ghosting, why make the effort to initiate communication with someone everyday for a month? If for sex, why would he talk to me for a month before bringing it up?

I’ve been talking to this guy from a dating app for a little over a month. We’re both PhD students in extremely demanding fields, which also makes things hard. Let me just jump into what’s been going on:

Pros:
-he asked for my number as soon as we matched
-asked me on a great first date (said he wanted to see me again after that)
-from the beginning texts me good morning pretty much every morning (except for a couple)
-texts me throughout the day
-acts supportive whenever I have a lot going on

Cons:
-I had to ask for date #2
-he’s updated his dating app maybe 2 days ago
-he’s also been busier for a few days (moving into a new place with his roommate). I asked him if something was up because he slowed down/stopped texting for a day or two but he apologized and went back to the usual texting
-As of right now because we’re both winding down the academic year, there’s no plan for #3 yet (#2 was a little over a week ago).

I will say, I updated my profile a couple weeks ago solely to have backups because I don’t want to get hurt. However, I think I’ve been clear that I’m really into him. I also overthink and I’ve been going back and forth with whether he’s into me or not (he could literally tell me he loves me and I still wouldn’t be sure, I’m an anxious person 💀)

Does it seem like he’s into me? And should I be worried that he updated his dating profile (like is this normal to do while you like someone or he’s probably slow fading/not very into me)? If I’m also wayyy overthinking, I’d also like to know. Thanks!

I met this guy on a dating site a few weeks ago and we’ve been texting everyday throughout the day since, with him initiating every morning. He asked me out for our first date. It went well and he and said he wanted to see me again soon after.

Some time passes and I got impatient and asked him on the second date. It seemed like we were both having a good time, but had a slight hiccup (he walked me to my apartment and I tried to kiss his cheek but he was trying to get to my lips but we laughed it off and had a quick peck after, it was an awkward/cute moment). We still expressed to each other that we had a good time.

But, it’s like things changed overnight after that because he’s been texting a lot less frequently and more sporadically. I’ve been used to waking up to a good morning text from him over the past few weeks but so far today, nothing. I also haven’t heard from him in over a day now.

I should also mention, we’re both PhD students so we’re both busy. But it’s literally gone from him texting me to let me know everything he’s doing, to much less frequent texting. It’s been a few days of this but I’m worried. My biggest priority is protecting myself and feelings if this is the beginning of a slow fade. Or maybe he felt weird from our moment from that night? I’d really like some input and can answer any other questions if more info is needed.