Search Results: dating a friend's ex

So there are a few people in my life, thankfully not many, who I have these multiple-years long conflicts with. We're talking like active hostility, they'll block me if I tried reaching out, that sort of thing. I've learned to just respect the fact they don't want to be in touch lol.

Now, me personally, I know what the conflicts are about, but I just don't see them as that big of a deal. Like the one conflict happened because the guy thought I was abusive to my ex girlfriend (I wasn't). Another happened with a girl I dated, who it turned out that she had a fiance and was dating me on the side. There's a conflict I had with two other ladies who had dated my friends, and who blocked me after the relationships ended. I'm sure there are others.

None of these people have any interest in interacting with me whatsoever and seem to be actively repelled by the idea, even years later. I guess I just don't see the big deal? Like I get that we aren't going to be friends, but we can't even engage in small talk and pleasantries? Some of these conflicts happened more than 5 years ago.

I realize that I'm probably more comfortable with confrontation than most people, but I feel like this isn't normal. Like, if you briefly dated my friend 5-7 years ago, we should probably be able to at least talk. I think the one where she cheated on her fiance with me makes a bit more sense that she wouldn't want to be in contact, but even that I just feel like replying to a message online isn't that big of a deal.

Am I missing something here?