Search Results: negative time in a relationship

Which one is better:
1. be an optimist and wait around for the world and everybody to fuck you over again and again?
2. be a pessimist and a cynic and be positively surprised when a good thing comes your way?

Yesterday my "former" best friend called me. We haven't talked in a while. One of the reasons was because every time we talk on the phone, we always end up fighting or in a negative mood. Yesterday was no different. And yesterday I found out why. Because he's too positive. He always says things are gonna get better for me, that I'm gonna find someone good, that I will get a good job and find a place to live where I could be happy. I'm 30 and have never been in any kind of relationship. Not because I didn't try. I'm on so many dating sites I'm now so tired of all the shallowness of it. I've come to believe there are no good single guys left that are aged 25-40, who is capable of a deep and meaningful relationship. I have no friends because every time I try to make friends, people always say A, then never deliver. People suck and again and again, I have been disappointed. I'm living in country that I don't want to live in, I hate the people and the culture of this country, but I don't want to go home because I also don't feel welcomed in my "home country" because I'm a religious and ethnic minority. And because of my passport, I can't go live in any country, because my country sucks so other countries don't trust my type of passport.

I will never be happy. I'm just enduring life for my family. How fucked up is that, that I told someone I can't talk to them anymore because they're positive all the time?

TBH I don't know what I want to achieve by posting this, but it's 8 pm here and I feel the nightly demons of depression rolling in and I have nobody to talk to. And no access to a mental health professional. I even volunteered at a cat shelter today, but even affection from those fur kitties can't chase away my nightly demons. I'm just so fucked up.

We had an agreement of total clarity - if anyone is uncomfortable - we say it. But I am a kind of person who needs time to think things through and consider if it's worth the fuss.

So I was thinking and being moody and snappy for a week and on Friday I've told him everything I didn't like. For example, how he always told me to "chill" and "relax", whenever I tried to express feelings like frustration or stress. He actually told me I'm quite forceful, intimidating and have anger issues, which I almost laughed at, because I had problems with self-validation and have been quite timid for the most of my life. I started to feel like my feelings are being considered unimportant and he didn't want to deal with it, so I've told him that and asked for support and understanding, things I thought to be natural in a relationship.
Afterwards he went out drinking with his pals, even though he doesn't like it, so I felt guilty for upsetting him.

The very next day I got into a situation where I had to go out in a heavy rain to do a favour and the person dumped me, so I had a sour mood and shared it with him, and guess what he said? "Calm down", "Look for positives". So I flipped my lid and told him that I asked him to stop with this generic shit, because that's not what I want, he said that he refuses to be negative and play part in my pity party, I said alright and that was it.

It was 10 days ago. We have an anniversary today and I dunno what to do really. Should I give him a chance and talk to him or just leave it as it is and just quietly change FB status to single to give a hint and avoid confrontation? 🤔 I'd like some insight and external opinion. Thanks in advance!

Now as you see in my pro i had to ask the question is it bad to be honest in a relationship to protect and help your partner.

How to explain it was just will be a long thing to rain I'm in a long-distance relationship with my man who I call Wolfy.

I love him so much and his friends are not the best people to be involved with us because they are so negative their users manipulators backstabbers and I have never done that to him and all I have done is be honest to him about some things that these people are when the time arrives.

The next issue of honesty is I'm honest with him about who he is and how he acts and behaves when he is inappropriate on when we have arguments. I mean what's the breaking up stuff like he's with me that he's not with me or he'll post on his social media that he's single women in fact he is with me but he broke up with me complication it's very hard and yes after everything you're going to read and it'll stay in your brain dump this guy.

But she is important to me and deep down I know that he is a very good man and he tries to change and he tries to show his best colors and I think with some of his friends so to say they're not really good people and they bring the worst out of him like insecurities past issues reminders it's it's hard to deal with sometimes.

But he's always telling me now like I need to stop being honest with him I need to lie.
I don't think I would be a good girlfriend or wife or friends or anything if I was not honest. I think that yes there are times to give Little White Lies like hey your cooking's good when in fact it's terrible or hey that sure looks good on you when you should set it on fire but when it comes to emotions and mental well-being and relationship issues I think it is a very good thing to be very honest.
I know I have made mistakes and I'm not the best girlfriend but I don't deserve to be dumped just because I'm honest