Search Results: feelings for another woman

I've always known that most women have a natural fear of men, especially if they are strangers. Men are stronger and usually more capable of inflicting physical harm & rape. That sure as hell doesn't mean that men will automatically do that. The vast majority of us would never even think of doing that. That even includes hitting a woman back when they hit us first (which is bullshit but that's another post).

But I can remember breaking up with my ex girlfriend a year ago. We were on the rocks and I had to come by her place to get my bicycle that was stored there. I also had to return some of her items. I expected to hear something bad from her that day (i. e. breakup) because things weren't going well the 2 weeks earlier.

Earlier in the week I asked her what would be a good time to stop by her place. She told me a specific time on the weekend. When I got there her roommate and her boyfriend were there. We were cordial but then my girlfriend said "hey Joey lets go for a walk". I then asked her roommate & her boyfriend if they wanted the living room door open or closed. I had noticed that the door was open when I got there. The boyfriend said "keep it open!". The tone in his voice was telling. My soon to be ex most likely told her roommate to be around when I came by. Her roommate likely invited her boyfriend over to just KEEP AN EYE on me. Just having three people look at me like I was a scumbag was a really awkward, embarrassing and shitty situation.

Now I had never once been violent, abusive or threatening with my ex girlfriend while we dated. Ever. I did get angry with her a few times but I never raised by voice. It's also not like I showed up to her doorstep unexpectedly.

Anyway above might not be the best example. However I remember feeling extremely insulted that she probably went to that extent (making sure her roommate and her boyfriend were around) because she was scared of how I would react even though I never gave her reason to think otherwise.

I turn 26 in a few months and I NEVER had a girlfriend. Seriously, I went all through middle school, high school, and even my traditional college-age years without having an official relationship.

Now I am in my mid-twenties and still don't have much luck.

I lost my virginity at 20 to a 16 year old young woman. We were both virgins, but she did not want a relationship with me. She was really a stranger to me and I drove to her state 7 hours away and we had sex. We only talked online for 2 months prior.

I was somewhat involved with another girl that age around that time, but we were only "boyfriend/girlfriend" for a week. It was awkward and she turned into a transgender dude not long after.

Yes. I made out with girls years ago, but none of them were in a relationship with me.

I only want a woman that had never had a romantic past, especially from her youth. This means no previous boyfriends or even male best friends she was close to growing up and had feelings for.

I basically am unable to get over a woman's romantic past.

I feel like I will live life alone.