Search Results: afraid to commit

My ex and I broke up in January cause this old client of mine popped up on tiktok as one of my friends still, that I had priorly lied to her about snapchatting. I was committed to my ex and in December had gone on a trip with her that cost $3500. I was going to move in after the vacation but she broke up with me again. She tried getting back with me but i didn't want to just yet because she wasn't forgiving me for everything and kept bringing it up. I thought moving in would end us completely. We've talked everyday since and have hooked up and in February she said she went on a date with someone. Nothing came of it but I could tell she kind of had a thing for him. We continued to talk and go out to eat and hooked up once. I thought we were going to get back together. Just recently, in the middle of May I asked her to grab dinner and she said she was seeing someone. Totally blindsided me and now Im destroyed and can't sleep and eat. She said "I wanted to let you know cause you said you didn't want to talk to me if I was talking with someone" A week later I called her and begged for her back but she told me to move on and that I would find someone. She told me things were serious with him and that he met her stepdad that raised her, went over to her dying fathers house but didn't meet him and met one of her friends. She told my mom that they were moving very very slow and he was the one that wanted to meet everyone. She has abandonment issues and I'm afraid that these guys will be together forever, cause he hasn't been in a relationship in awhile either. He doesn't mind that she still talks with me but I'm on day 7 of not contacting her at all after my mental breakdown phonecall. I want my ex back and I don't know what to do to make her trust and forgive me again and show her that I'm committed. Opinions? I am A, the new guy is B.

I've never been charged but I have committed 5 class B misdemeanor offenses from late 2018- late 2019. All of which were the same offense, soiliciting an escort.

It was only sex though, I didn't threaten any of them or anything, so the only offense I could've been charged with was the class B misdemeanor for solicitation. Police found out about it I'm sure by looking through the phone records for one of the escorts that went missing months later. This was the third time I'd done it at that point.

I assured them that I had nothing to do with her disappearance and told them I'd never do it again. I meant it but I allowed my apathy to rule me again and did it two more times. After that, my mind finally caught up with my actions and how wrong what I was doing is.

Since then, I've grown a lot as a person and become much more aware of my mistakes.
If I could go back, I wouldn't have done what I did at all but I can't go back and can only move forward. Luckily the escort was found alive but scared not too long after and I have not received any further contact from police.

At the time I didn't like police as much because well, I was breaking the law and was afraid they'd investigate me over something that to me at the time, was no big deal. I realize now that soliciting an escort is immoral and just because I was paying them and they'd hug me doesn't mean they enjoyed anything that happened in the hotel room.

On the bright side, I tracked some social media pages down and the girls I saw are doing much better and pursuing careers that hopefully will be rewarding and joyful. I didn't contact them though as they probably don't want to hear from me. The statute of limitations has expired and law enforcement has decided not to charge me. I've become very fond of them as they gave me a second chance that I didn't deserve. Have you been charged before?