Search Results: marriage license

Every marriage is a 3way: you, her, and Uncle Sam. The early years, you barely know Sam is there. A license for the marriage, and some minor changes at tax time. Other than that, it is pretty easy to forget all about him. Life is good.
But Sam is just being patient. The marriage hits a rough patch after your first kid is born. Fortunately, things get better. You both genuinely enjoy being parents, so a couple years later, you have a second kid. And a second rough patch. Only this time it doesn't get better. You double down, determined to make it work. But eventually your wife announces she wants out. Too late, you realize Uncle Sam is in your house. He has been all along. He drops his pants, and his massive dink the $1 billion divorce industry -- rips into you.

He tears you apart. All your hopes and plans for the future? Gone. Your ambitions and dreams? Irrelevant. Your careful savings and investments? Sam pillages them without mercy. A decade of sweat and hard work, erased in an instant.

Your wife is long gone, but Uncle Sam still visits. Once a month, he shows up demanding money. Send the checks to the ex, or get phucked again. Next time he won't be so gentle. "Keep her happy," he warns you. "If she complains too much, I can take your kids, your passport, your career, and even your freedom."