Search Results: hurting her during sex

I am asking this because I am dating this girl. It is actually very normal for her to cook for me whenever I visit. When we get into a fight she usually make tea or coffee and we sit down and talk through everything.

Lately, there was a big fight where I was essentially on the verge of breaking up with her. We dont yell at each other or anything. It is just an intense conversation. Now... I have noticed something...

On 2 different occasions she has paused the argument and said, "Can we talk about this in bed?"

I am pissed off and she is pissed off so I am very confused by this. I sit at the edge of the bed. Then after 30 minutes of fighting back and forth she will ask me to join her at the head of the bed next to her. Then we lay there and talk some more. Sometimes there will be a dog cuddled between us and we pet the dog together while we talk.

In these moments I am pissed off but I want to have sex with her. It is so confusing why she is doing this when both of us are hurting and in pain?

I can count the times on one hand I’ve had women apologize to me in romantic scenarios. In every one of these cases these women still wanted something from me (attention, relationship, sex, money, etc).

I’ve never had a woman apologize to me for doing something shitty/disrespectful after she lost interest. Never. In all of these scenarios she would try to gaslight me or give a pathetically fake apology just to posture and avoid guilt.

I have on the otherhand apologized if I was legitimately wrong to a woman w/ no agenda other than being a empathic to her feelings.

When I broke up with my last ex I acknowledged the horrible struggle she was going through (in her personal life and family) and how she deserved better. I told her I knew me breaking up was going hurt even more. However I also said I had my mind made up and I had to be honest.

I apologized about how the timing of it hurt even more (given her other problems). She wanted me to meet her family and I knew breaking up after that meeting then would only make everything worse.

But that didn’t mean I no longer respected her as person. I did genuinely care for her situation despite no longer wanting to date. That’s why I was respectful as I could be during the break up. I still respected her as a human being despite not wanting to date her anymore.

But from my experience women take their negative emotions via no longer being attracted to a guy as justification to treat him lower than pond scum.