Like. Some of my guy friends might say that about someone, as a joke. And it's obviously not in conversation with these strangers. But it still just sounds weird af...
You know. I think it comes from them living in a time when women laughed at some of the men's more direct ways of flirting. And that they also were brought up to be generally more gentleman like.
Like. It wouldn't be uncommon for a guy to be whistling at a woman he likes. But also open doors for her and pay for the restaurant bills etc.
Eh, I've been called everything under the sun and none of it really bothers me. There are only 2 things someone can say that will truly ever be offensive to me.
¹Say whatever you want about me, put my kids names in your mouth to my face and I will ensure you and your dentist become very well acquainted. (Not you specifically just the general way of saying you meaning anyone)
²When someone genuinely compliments me. I don't do well with self image and even worse with recognition. When someone is saying nice things about me, I genuinely feel like they are lying just to be nice. It legit makes me upset when they persist.
"You should be glad you got raped. Not many people can boast about getting laid at such a young age."
That was definitely meant to be a joke. There's not very much anyone could say that would ever offend me and I certainly wasn't offended by that remark either, but wow oh wow that was in poor taste... I think there are just certain jokes that broach subject matter that everyone has a different relationship with. And when you broach those subjects, people feel uneasy because they realize that their unique reaction is always going to be in the minority, no matter what because no one else has that same relationship to the subject matter.
I guess all kinds of racist and discriminatory things, those would be offensive... did I feel offended though? no.
And it's been mostly online and from people with their own agenda, so I don't take it personal... and in person? well... face to face people are not as confrontational, at least with me.
''You are quite handsome for being a dwarf''. I'm not that sensitive about my height and knowing the person they probably sincerely meant it as a compliment, nevertheless ''dwarf'' is an insult, clear and concise.
A girl I was dating started to giggle to herself one night while we were walking her dog. So i asked her what was so funny, and she told me "You're so cute, sometimes i forget that you're fat. "
Yeah, perfect example of a backhanded compliment. Strangely, she's actually only one of two ex's I'll even speak to. She was half my age, so maybe that's a factor, I don't know.
But that managed to bug me more than usual because I'm mixed. I'm half-white and my Japanese friends used to tease me about it. I always wanted to belong as Japanese but my white features do make me stand out a bit. Well, it's a silly thing, but I just never expected to be called a weaboo.
Maybe it is like calling a half-black person who is talking about black culture a "wigger"... something like this. It's probably very specific to us mixed people since I think we struggle a bit with a sense of belonging.
I usually don't get so tilted by insults but maybe there's a truth to it. You know, like I'm not fully Japanese, so maybe I am a pretender of sorts. I can't help it either way: born in Japan and it's all I really know well. Well, I'm pretty sure the person who called me this didn't realize at all that I'm from Japan: born and raised. But it's like maybe they have a point.
I didn't so well in the US either. I had worse there with people shouting at me to go back to my own country, but maybe because my English was poor at the time. Well, my bad for rambling. But that weaboo thing really threw me off.
Christmas Eve my sister, who works at a bank, had to start work at 8. I am a home health aide who was scheduled for 6 a. m. When I mentioned this, she said, “But I have a real job.”
Background information: My sister had been working in that position for about a year. Previously she was a busy housewife with four children and a demanding husband. I made a point of never saying anything to make her feel like what she did all day wasn’t worth being recognized. Meanwhile, I was a single CNA with 18 years experience working in institutions, mostly with the elderly but also with developmentally disabled adults. That last year I had switched to a home health agency, which allows me to make and also change my schedule fairly quickly as our mom has had health problems and both our parents are in their eighties.
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