How did it feel when you saw your ex with someone else?

[Anonymous]

[abc3643]

Good question!
The first time that I ever saw this was in the summer of 1982.
My first girlfriend had just dumped me on 01 JAN 1982 just after my first semester of my freshman year in college. I was in real love for the first time in my life, so her dumping me was devastating and I didn't get over it until August 1984.
Anyway, after that freshman year which ended in May 1982, I started a summer job at major park in our community. Now, this was a new job for me at this park - I was working in concessions. When I was in high school the previous 3 summers (1979,1980,1981), I worked in this park in a recreational program for mentally handicapped kids. So, I'd still see all my old coworker friends in the park in the summer of 1982.
One thing at the park was a large gazebo by a lake and that's where the recreational group had a BBQ lunch on Fridays. One Friday, I visited and I noticed HIS car right next to mine... "HIS car" meaning the car of my replacement - the new boyfriend. It was parked next to my car!! And there I saw them... walking hand-in-hand toward the lake near the gazebo. It was killing me. I was very upset and started clawing at my arm. I guess kids would say I was "self-harming". I never did that before and it was somewhat instinctive - I wanted so much to interact with her (I hadn't seen her since my birthday in early January right after she dumped me) but it wouldn't have been right to start drama - especially, since, technically, I was working at the concessions stand.

Something else that bothered me... this new guy was actually a guy I knew through friends. We were going to hang out together at some point. I was a year ahead of him and my ex-GF though and that never happened. So, here's this guy I had liked and now he's become my personal Darth Vader.

I've never seen her or him since although he very inconveniently has a large romantic picture of himself in MY yearbook in which he is dancing at MY prom with this attractive red head from my year.

All of that said, I am still friends with that first girlfriend and trade emails with her once or twice a year.
But that still was a killer experience.

I went through something like that again sometime later in 1987, 1996, and in 2002ish with my 2nd girlfriend, but I dumped her in 1986 but always remained friends. I was heartbroken a bit in 1987 because, even though I dumped her, I didn't move on, but she did and that hurt. The two latter instances, I had completely moved on - I even stayed at the house she and her boyfriend were living in one night!

That 1982 instance though... that hurt. It was like a personal 9/11 experience almost.

[EricWeston]

It hurt for a moment. I don't understand how you can be so intimate with a person for so many years, then all the sudden turn all your feelings off and act like they mean nothing anymore. I get attached to women so it's always difficult to let go, it takes a lot for me to stop caring about someone.

[jennifer_bloom]

It’s never happened while I still had feelings for them. Even when I like a guy, he doesn’t get a girlfriend until I no longer like him.

[Anonymous]

I’d feel happy - I know he deserves someone that is a better match for him than I was and I hope he’ll find her soon.

[melnc]

A little curiosity and jealousy

[AsaKyo]

I never really had this problem because he's still obsessed with me

[LavLavLuv]

Kinda funny only for a minute