Can you see why I’m reluctant to date this woman because the three other relationships I had with women of her race didn’t work out?

[Anonymous]

And I’m not saying it’s her race’s fault, it’s probably my fault tbh as three relationships have failed with them so I’m not going to be so arrogant to blame it all on them. I just think we culturally clash and my initial appeal of being blonde haired, pale and tall with a Deep South London accent wears off for them. But I’ve been seeing this woman as a friend for four months and tbh we have been having sex but recently she’s been asking if I love her and if we should move in together but I think us both having an emotional relationship will only end it tears, do you agree?

[Anonymous]

So tell me if I got this right:
- you have known her for four months
- you are friends with benefits.
- suddenly she is asking if you love her (does she know you are friends with benefits?)
- you are talking about moving in together even though you have only known each other for four months and have not yet defined your relationship?


I am sorry but it sounds like one big disaster to me.
First you need to define your relationship before you can do anything else. Are you friends with benefits?, are you dating?, are just friends? What are you?
Second, you need some space. Moving in together after only knowing each other for four months is a horrible idea especially when you are not even in love.
Third, I have a question. What does race have to do with any of this?

[Asker]

Yes four months, I told her we were just friends at first but she keeps trying to push this into a relationship and race is relevant because every relationship I’ve had with her race left me heart broken so I’m not willing to risk going to the next step

[Opinion Owner]

Race is not relevant. It has nothing to do with race. Maybe it has something to do with cultural differences, I don’t know. But it has nothing to do with race.

You clearly don’t want a relationship otherwise you would not use the word “force”. Tell her that you just want to be friends.

[Opinion Owner]

I am sorry not I meant the word “push”