How to get love?

[Anonymous]

How do you get to be loved by the opposite sex? I'm not talking about sex, but the emotion. Apparently being kind, caring and generous, looking good etc isn't enough?

[SlashedSunset]

Kind, caring, generous and good looking? Man sounds like you are the full package if you find a lady like that you try to win her heart and make her your Princess. But, to hopefully answer your question; now I don't know all your circumstances (are you meeting guys irl, online etc.) but I will aim to provide some insight.

Maybe try to find out more about the guys and what they are looking for. Are they saying they are looking to date seriously, date seriously but no pressure or only for fun? Do they mention things like getting married or having a family one day or not? Basically look for signs on guys who are looking for love as well. Now this might not guarantee love but it gives a better chance. When you get a feel for the guy and date him eventually work more personal questions in on what you think is important in a relationship foster him to ask his questions on what he considers important. What connections do you two share? What differences do you accept or can live with?

If he does nice things for you and genuinely cares about your well being while worrying about you then search your feelings on how you feel towards him and if you do care about him in the same way or the way you feel love then pursue those feelings further. Anyway hope some of this helps if you have further questions feel free to ask!

[Asker]

I'm not the one saying I'm all of those things, that's what the guy I previously was with told me, and also that I'm sweet, mellow, easy going and down to earth. Still, he didn't want a committed relationship. And neither does anybody else it seems.

[SlashedSunset]

Ah, I see my mistake. Well one possibility is he might be scared at the prospect of a committed relationship; there are times when men have a constant storm of debate occurring in our minds. One week we are open and happy at the prospect of clicking with and finding that special lady to share our lives together. The next week we have worries and doubts popping up wondering is this how we truly feel for a variety of reasons sometimes it's hard to believe someone truly cares that much about us or that if we are not sure we don't want to hurt her later on (these are just a few examples but it leads into the next possibility).

Another possibility is he for whatever reason thought it would not work out but he didn't think you were a bad person and didn't dislike you so we wanted to let you down easy. Thus, he highlighted those qualities trying to be considerate of your feelings thinking it would soften the blow.

I see did these other guys say the same or similar things as well when telling you they didn't want anything serious? If you are comfortable sharing more; when did they let you know they didn't want something serious, early on or later in the relationship? Were you guys just dating or did you call each other boyfriend and girlfriend status? Did you sleep together? (You can send me these as messages if you would prefer not posting those answers here).

When you start a relationship either irl or through online what do you say you are looking for: to date seriously, to keep things light, etc. Hopefully all these questions aren't too overwhelming and that these answers are helping to a certain extent.

[WhyMe247]

I’d say just be yourself and it will happen. Love is patient and kind, etc. however it goes lol. Seriously, I’ve always been told the moment you stop looking for love, it will find you; true love that is. I don’t know how true that is, but hopefully I’ll see one day!

[Flower7]

I’m not sure. I haven’t figured it out yet.

[Asker]

Me neither

[UniquelyBasic]

Sounds like youve been through something.

[Asker]

I have, but I really would like to know

[SaVaGe22]

Than be a famous or rich.

[Asker]

I'm neither but I am in the last stages of getting a degree that will grant me a high income job

[SaVaGe22]

Darling if you think one piece of paper (degree) grant you high income job than you're in dream world.

[Asker]

I'm in a very high demand profession

[SaVaGe22]

Which profession?

[Asker]

I'm in engineering

[SaVaGe22]

Oh wow. That's awesome.
Than definitely you need talent over degree in engineering.

[Jmmmfi4]

I wouldn't have a clue