What do guys love about an innocent, trusting woman in her late 20s? Can anyone love me? I get taken advantage of a lot?

[Anonymous]

Just curious if there's anything good about this type of personality cause it seems like we just get taken advantage of a lot in life whether its by friends or lovers etc.

[TheLoneTerran]

You can be innocent and trusting without being naive. There's so many possible meanings for 'innocent' than even not being very experienced in relationships shouldn't blind you to people who are obviously looking to use you for something, either to mark up as a conquest, or to trap and manipulate.

Honestly, I've seen a lot more women start going after the 'innocent' girl because they gain the 'innocent' person's trust much easier than a guy.

[Asker]

Womem go after innocent women for what?

[TheLoneTerran]

The same thing predatory men would go for. Sex and manipulation. It's just that a lot less women recognize the behavior for what it is because they believe a women wouldn't act that way. Both genders are human, and unfortunately, that means both genders have a lot of jackasses. The women target the innocent girl because it's easier to build the trust since many women would be questioning the guys motives.

[Asker]

Does it count if I was molested by peers around my age even younger since I was like 10? By peers I mean girls my own age or younger.

[Asker]

I jud dont get why 10 year old girls would want sex from me for. But they wanted to do stuff with me and I was either not into it but let it happen let them control me or I was led into it and once they start touching you down there yeah its human nature to somewhat get pleasure.

[TheLoneTerran]

Yes, ANY unwanted touching or not giving them a clear go ahead is sexual assault/rape. Also, to combine your two questions, there's a common saying that rape isn't about sex, it's about power; control over the person. Those girls may not have understood WHY they liked doing it, but they had you at their mercy.

Even if being led into it, it still counts as a sexual crime. Being led into it is called coercion. And yes, feeling some pleasure may happen, it's biology and all that, but it still doesn't mean it wasn't a sexual crime. You feeling any pleasure does not scrub away the seriousness of what they did to you.

I highly, highly, highly recommend speaking to a psychologist and/or therapist. Unpack what happened and work through it to help bring some peace or relief. Keeping something like that held in can sometimes cause issues down the line, not to say it would cause a mental illness but it wouldn't help if you already had other factors, and heavy things like this can weigh on your mind for a long time before you notice it affecting you.

One thing to remember is "You're not at fault. They touched you without your express permission, your consent." That's something that needs to be taken to heart. And it doesn't matter or say anything about you that you felt some pleasure. I'm not a doctor or a lawyer so I cannot give specific advice other than suggesting you look for a professional to talk to about this. It can't hurt and it has a large potential to help.

[Asker]

Thank you sweetie. I think this could help me overcome my weakness of being taken advantage of. If i just talk to someone about it all. Thank you. X

[TheLoneTerran]

You're very welcome. Best of luck in whatever route you choose to take.

[UniquelyBasic]

If it happens a lot then Id say you're the reason why they take advantage of you. They know you won't stand up to them and will let them walk over you. Dont put up with that and tell them No once in a while.

[FunkyMonkee]

Sounds nice, to me except that, you have to learn NOT to be taken advantage of.

[Anonymous]

I prefer this type of woman.