Have you ever dated someone perfect but had no feelings for them?

[Anonymous]

I am dating a "perfect" guy but I have no feelings for him. It's been 2 months and I don't know if I should break it off..

Updates

+1 y

Thanks guys. He's perfect in the sense that he's kind, respectful, likes me, he's clear, has a good career and is good looking. He never leaves me to question anything and I trust him.

I've been through some very shitty guys and I'm afraid that by leaving him I'll never find someone like him again. But there's no connection from my side...

[Googlemyahoo]

Dated a girl in HS who was essentially perfect. I actually liked her in a previous grade but she wasn’t interested at the time and sorta shut me down. Then like a year later she wanted some kept asking me out. That for some reason made me resentful and spiteful.

She was very pretty, athletic, nice to talk to similar interests & parents were rich. First “date” was watching Disney’s original Beauty & the Beast which I never saw. Part way through we ended up fucking.

It was grade 12 and I had a girlfriend who liked what I liked, was hot & wealthy and liked to screw anywhere anytime but for some fucked up reason I was disinterested.

She also began talking about how her family all married and started families young. Like right out of school and wanted me to knock her up. Actually said that while fucking told me to “fucking knock me up!”

I ended up ghosting her. 🤷‍♂️

She didn’t take it well actually punched me in the face lol. I could’ve probably married her right out of HS and had a white collar job at her parents business ah well. 🫤

[Andres77]

If you feel nothing for him then he’s not perfect.
is the sex awesome? Then friends with benefits. Would you want him to be the father of your children? Even if you don’t want to have children now? Then cut it off. The longer you stay the more obligated you will feel to do something you don’t want to do.

the fact that you posted this sounds like you already know what you need to do, it’s just not easy.

I hope you find what you need.

[Asker]

Thank you.

We haven't had sex as 2 months is too early for me. He hasn't pressured me into it yet either.
He's a respectful, kind guy who treats me with respect and works very hard. He'd be a great father but I have no feelings and speaking of marriage so quickly scares me...

[Andres77]

You can admire him and still not want to be in a deep relationship with him.
“Every date is a potential mate”.
It’s either for sex or I was investing in a potential relationship.
For me, the long term assessment for marriage potential starts the moment we start to communicate.
Every marriage started with the initial greeting.

[Andres77]

Not to dredge up dark stuff but if one has had a history of abuse, sometimes they are so drawn to abusive behavior that normal or good behavior actually puts up a wall.
If you don’t have any history of abuse then maybe the chemistry is just off and you can’t force it. If you do have a history of abuse then maybe I’d look into therapy before you let this guy go. He sounds like a catch and I’d hate to think that you let him slip away because your mind wouldn’t let you see him for what he is.
I’d still do a background check on the guy, regardless.

[Jamie05rhs]

I agree with the last thing you said, Andres.

[midnightmoon05]

Yeah. After 4 dates, I was kind and told him I didn’t feel the same. So that he can meet someone who feels that way about him.

[belle_kai]

Maybe they're not really perfect then? Do you mean perfect on paper but you're just not attracted to them?

[Asker]

Yes. And he's very good looking too and he likes me a lot. But I have no feelings for him..

[belle_kai]

Delve deeper into your inner self. Maybe you're scared and put up a barrier

[Asker]

I dont think so..

[belle_kai]

He's not perfect then

[exitseven]

I had a female friend that really was amazing. We always had lots of fun and we really did have a lot in common. Sometimes I thought that she might want it to be more than friendship. I thought about it too. My intellect tried to tell me it would be good but I just did not feel it. She was pretty and smart but there just was no real physical attraction.

[Jamie05rhs]

Same. I've experienced that before as well

[glennos89]

If you don't have feelings for him it has no chance of succeeding anyways so then you better tell him and move on. Otherwise it will make you unhappy in a while and you also hurt him more.
No mather how perfect he is, if you dont have feelings for him you are better off being normal friends with him then to stay in the relationship🤷🏼‍♂️

[izmir1215]

Honestly, I have dated someone "perfect" before (perfect for me specifically) however when things are not meant to be like in your case they are just not meant to be we both loved each other she was perfect the single best human I have met to this date but if the law of nature isn't having it so you won't have it either so it's wise to call it off before you end up regretting it because love is something you just can't come to terms with

[Asker]

Thank you so much.

[UnknownSwede]

If you have no feelings for them, they are not perfect for you. Maybe they are perfect when it comes to physical appearance but that's only one part. Or maybe it's that they are perfect in having the same interest but still not having the connection that needs to be there in how you communicate and act around people.

There's nothing that is set in stone for what's perfect.

[Mark987]

Yes of course. Was it more physical? I have been with a few women where the date was awesome but... there was no feelings.. but we ended up friends

[Asker]

Yes he's physically attractive.

[Nye221]

You should let him know and break it off so that he can actually be the perfect guy for someone who's attracted to him. The more you continue the harder it will be on him.

[loveslongnails]

This is really a dumb post, girl. He's obviously not "perfect for you", or you wouldn't be asking this question.

[Asker]

You'd be surprised if you had known what kind of men I'd dated in the past. He's an angel and very good looking and for that reason I can't make up my mind. I don't want to go back to the same men and same experiences as before.

[loveslongnails]

Assuming he's the "only decent man left on the planet", you'd rather stay with him when you have zero feelings for him and pretend that you do? How selfish is that? What about him? If you really care for him, why would you do that to HIM? He deserves someone who has real feelings for him, not someone who doesn't have any and is sticking around because he's better than her previous men. Do both of you a favor and move on and tell him why too!

[TonyMetal___86]

Nope never been with a perfect person and i don't believe that there's someone who is perfect!

[Asker]

He is perfect because he respects me, likes me, has a good career and is good looking. He hasn't put me through any anxiety yet and I feel that I can trust him. This is very hard to find when dating young guys.

[TonyMetal___86]

I'm happy for you rapunzel princess and i hope that he keeps it this way...
Time will tell!

[20yearsolder]

You should absolutely break it off, why waste any more time? If you have no feelings then it's stupid to stay

[SassyAussieAddy]

If there's no chemistry then it isn't going to last.

[dustybiker]

We can’t choose who we love. Unfortunately.

[Guardian45]

TOO true!

[Con29]

Yeah I dated this one girl who was amazing until I told her about a few things I liked in the bedroom

[Con29]

Can I ask you something

[Asker]

Sure

[Con29]

Would you be open to things in the bedroom?

[Jamie05rhs]

You should explicitly give him permission to try to turn you on.
You might be surprised by the results. 😉

[Havthrills]

2 months and nothing? I guess break it off. Kick it around a little. Rub it in The dirt? If you have no feelings for him, why date him?

[Havthrills]

Maybe it's because you're used to shifty guys. I find myself missing some things from past relationships. One was horrible but I miss some of it. Probably because I got used to it.

[Dreamclouds]

Yes I did, even a perfect woman rode me tens of times and felt nothing, was really weird because I was so mesmerized by her physical appearance but wasn't enough so we had to just break it.

[genericname85]

no. never dated anyone even close to perfect. but i'm not perfect either.

[Anonymous]

Honestly no. I basically fall into the category of feel to much for people who don't even reply to me. And I've never been on a date.

I guess if your not feeling it maybe it's best to move on for both of you.

[Opinion Owner]

It's understandable that fear. I have that as well. I do think you will be able to find someone. I wonder if past experiences is part of the issue in the sense you won't let yourself feel maybe or maybe just not the right one for you. But maybe you could be friends it's up to both of you.

I really hope what I've said doesn't come across in a poor way.

[Guardian45]

Yes, I married her. We divorced after she was abusive. The WORST mistake I EVER made!
NEVER AGAIN!

[motownplayer2000]

No one I dated was “perfect…” they all had flaws I overlooked at the time.

[boggboss]

I wouldn't waste someone's time like that

[Asker]

That's why I am thinking to break it off. I don't want to waste his time.

[boggboss]

I just wouldn't see the point although u say they are perfect being attracted to them is a pretty important thing

[Asker]

Yeah...

[boggboss]

Staying with someone because they are nice but u don't have a connection with them is pretty shitty

[Kuroz090]

Yes. Don't waste his time more than you already have. Do it today.

[NathanDavis]

never...

I like to make sense

[dustybiker]

@NathanDavis How often do you not make sense? Ballpark.

[NathanDavis]

@dustybiker 99% of the time I make sense

could drop lower, to 96% around the weekends...

[dustybiker]

lmao

[Berethor]

Another proof that women don't know what they want. :)

[Asker]

I know what I want.

[Erron_Black]

there is never a perfect one

[Asker]

We haven't even argued once yet.

[Erron_Black]

that doesn't mean he's perfect

[Juxtapose]

He's obviously not perfect then, move on.

[Onashir]

Yea sad

[EaterPeter]

I guess

[EaterPeter]

I had negative feelings I guess

[EaterPeter]

Thanks for like!

[ThebestIndian]

Happens

[Anonymous]

Pm me